controversial thoughts n opinions

I am tired

I just realized how less of time I got now...

I am selling my youth, I am literally being used as cheap labour.

But worst part is that when I see older successful men at work, I cant help but feel jealous.

They have a wife and kid. They go back to hot food ready at home.

I know I am never going to have that.

I come back home to eat junk, or cold tasteless food from my hostel

During times like that I miss my mother cuz she will probably be the last one who cares for me like that.

But these men, they have got so much love, they have a loving wife who makes them food, they have a child, they have so much.

I know years from now, I'll be alone, single, probably living in my own apartment with maybe a roomate but yeah that would be all.

I know that I am the one who has chosen this life. I chose to struggle instead of getting married and becoming a housewife.

I do not hate housewives but I just didn't want to end up like my aunt or my mom who spend their lives locked up in a toxic household with nothing to call as their own.

That's the only thing that does give me strength to move forward...

But something the stress and work pressure, I find it too hard to handle these days and often times I find myself wishing to be comforted by a man.

A man who would love ne unconditionally, would respect and care for me.

Would prepare a hot meal for me when I reach home tire from work

I wished to have all of that so bad...

That's why I'm so jealous of men at higher ups...

Because I know my mother will be the last person to prepare a hot meal for me when I reach home tired🙂