"Jesus, the boy just couldn't catch a break could he?" He muttered to himself when the alarm went off the next morning and he had awoke to an empty bed and the familiar sounds last night of Phil retching in the bathroom once again. A surge of anger washed through him as he thought of Phil's dad and how he was the one who had caused the younger boy to be so afraid of everything. White hot fury built up in his mind and caused his muscles to clench unconsciously,tensing with the ferocious squeeze of a python. He could still hear the echo of Phil's nightmare induced cries in his head, could still see how scared the boy was when he'd awoken, as he had gasped for breath before running out of the room in blind terror. He could just picture a scared baby Phil curled in a corner, left by himself for days with no one to look after him as he wailed in loneliness and hunger and sadness.
His fist had hit the wall before he'd even had time to comprehend what was happening. Pain swelled up inside of him but he was gone past caring, he wanted to hurt the people who had hurt Phil, but he couldn't. What could he do? He was just a mere fourteen year old boy who stayed inside all day and watched too much Anime and YouTube. He tried to calm himself, taking deep breaths and rationalizing that if he got the full the truth out of Phil, then the younger boy wouldn't have to see his father anymore and then Dan would have helped Phil in a way that nobody else had been able too.
He lept off Phil's bed and down the small corridor to the bathroom and knocked hastily against the door, "Phil, are you okay in there? I heard you being sick, do you need a glass of water or a cuddle or something?"The only reply he received was the sounds of sobbing, even harsher than that of the night before. Dan was about to leave and get Scott but he could hear the sounds of building screams and stopped dead in his tracks, wondering if Phil was having some sort of breakdown. He knew this was due to some sort of fear of Phil's and anger welled up him again as he cursed the injustice of everything and everyone and how they all seemed to hurt Phil. He could feel himself shaking, fists clenched up into balls by the side of him,as fury coursed through his veins. He tried to calm down for Phil, to help Phil but he couldn't the anger just kept on pulsing and the blood kept pumping viciously around him.
When he came out of his trance of anger, it was to the sound and sight of Scott as he soothed him, crouched in front of him so he could make eye contact with him. "Dan, it's okay. You don't need to be angry at Phil, he doesn't mean to get so upset," he reprimanded him carefully, misunderstanding Dan's anger entirely.
Shock struck through Dan as he scowled at Scott before half shouting, "I'm not angry at Phil, I'm angry for Phil and whatever those sick bastards did to him to make him so afraid of everything!"
Scott stared at Dan before smiling, wrapping an arm around the boy's shoulders. " Language Daniel but I'm glad Phil has you, Dan. But now we need to focus more on the matter at hand, getting Phil out of the bathroom and in a stable enough state to go to school." He drew a spare set of keys for every room in the care home out of his pocket before slowly twisting the key in the lock, allowing them to see into the bathroom. Phil was draped tearfully over the toilet seat, arms resting on the edge of it to stop his sweat drenched hair from getting near the result of his fear. Red rimmed eyes which overflowed with tears looked anxiously at Dan and Scott before he brought his head back over the toilet and dispelled his stomach again, heaving again and again as his exhausted stomach tried to find something to get rid of seeing as the boy hadn't ate since the morning beforehand, too afraid of Dan's arrival; forgoing dinner all together. Dan and Scott were immediately at his side, rubbing soothing circles into his back and hair, whispering how it would be okay. Dan dropped to his knees next to Phil and just sat there in a comforting silence, occasionally dabbing the boys forehead with a cold flannel when he had stopped throwing up.
They had finally managed to drag Phil back to their room and stopped at the bed, sitting him upright so he was leaning against Scott's chest. Dan felt a flare of jealously, he wanted to be the one Phil found comfort in before he realized that Phil had put his trust in Scott a long time before Dan had came to the home. He felt a dainty hand entwine with his and he smiled, staring at the pale fingers that were clenched in his. He let a smile drift across his features when he realized that Phil was trying to cheer Dan up, even though it was Phil who was so torn up.
"S-s-sco-t-t, ca-can I s-st-t-stay h-h-home from-m sch-hool today," Phil begged anxiously as Scott and Dan felt their hearts plummet at the evident fear in the Phil's voice. Dan was just about to nod yes when Scott's words caused him to stop in his tracks.
"Philly, you know Dan and I would love you to just stay here where we know you're safe but you have to go to school. You can't keep hiding forever, you know your counselor told you that you were bordering on extreme agoraphobia. Well, Dan and I, we want you to get better so you really need to go Phil. I'll have a special word with Miss Chomps on the phone so she knows to be easy on you today, okay?" Scott had tried to ration with Phil as Dan felt anxious at the thought of Phil being sent to school when he was in such a bad state. Phil just stared back at Scott with a look of horror before he gulped and nodded meekly, too scared of confrontation to argue.
"Dan and I are going to let you get changed out of your PJ's, whilst we have a quick word." Scott informed Phil, giving him no room for argument. Dan left with Scott once more, almost wincing at the memory of having to do so as well last night and the truth he had been informed of.
Scott placed a hand on his shoulder, "Nervous about starting back school?" He inquired , knowing that it was always hard for kids to go back to school after being admitted to care.
Dan shook his head in response, "Nope, I don't let people knock me around, they'll soon see that they still won't get one over on me anytime soon." Scott smiled at Dan's bravado as he caught a small glimpse of uncertainty in the eyes at the prospect of a new term but now as a care kid.
"Maybe that's for the best then, Dan, as I really need you to look out for Phil. You're only two years older than him, I'm not asking you to cast away all of your friends and just be with Phil, only take care of him, okay? I know it may not be the coolest thing to do but Phil reacts violently to any situation if he gets overwhelmed, scared or upset, make sure if you can that he's not alone if he's having problems breathing or is crying; the school are aware of Phil's behavioral tendencies and will ring me if you inform them. Phil is in the additional support classes, he's incredibly smart but because of his behavioral problems when he gets scared, it's best for him to be away from the hustle of main school classes."
Dan nodded to everything, knowing immediately that he would try to stay besides Phil at all times, he didn't like the people he had to put up with as friends now anyway. "Wait, Scott!" He called to the retreating man, "Is Phil getting bullied?" He whispered.
Scott stared back at Dan with sad eyes before confiding, " We think so, he comes home a lot with bruises or he's crying, but he won't tell us why. Claiming he fell or tripped down the stairs, we've tried to inform the school but without no definite proof or names off Phil they can't do anything and Phil hardly talks about happy things, never mind things that make him unhappy. You've seen his recent black eye, yes? Poor boy swears that he tripped on his way to school. Maybe you could be his saving grace, Dan." And with that Scott headed downstairs to greet the other kids or wake the ones that had slept through their alarms, leaving Dan to stand alone in the middle of the corridor as he tried to comprehend why people couldn't just leave his Philly alone.
When he entered the room, Phil was fully dressed in black skinny jeans, a shirt, red tie, black blazer and black converse, the same as what Dan wore to school too. He noticed the tremble of the younger boys hands as he took them in his own before pulling him close and whispering, "It's okay Philly, I got you, we'll get through this day together. I won't let anyone hurt you today, not ever."
In hindsight, Dan shouldn't have made that promise. He got the sick feeling that he wouldn't be able to keep it, especially today...
ESTÁS LEYENDO
Illuminated // Phan (boyxboy)
FanfictionWhen home's not safe - where do you run? Thrown away like a useless piece of rubbish by his mother, Dan Howell thinks he's going to be alone in the world in his new carehome. What he doesn't imagine will happen is the unbreakable bond that forms...