Illuminated // Phan (boyxboy)

Chapter 13

(this is a kind of filler chapter, prepare for the angst!)

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

Phil was visiting his dad today, Scott was probably outside waiting for him so they could grab pizza and cheer Phil up, he was bound to be down in the dumps after seeing his father again. How could he have been so stupid and completely forget about what Phil was probably having to go through after seeing his father. The poor boy was probably distraught; he knew that if he had to see his mother again he'd be livid, not to mention hurt. Dan found it hard to put to scale; his hatred for his mother compared to how deeply and truly Phil must detest with a burning passion - his parents.

He decided to play it coy with Connor, he didn't want to lose the boys friendship and selfish as it was, if it meant he could continue his friendship then he'd still be Connors boyfriend - even if it was only one sided now. Call him selfish and self centered but his boyfriend had been his rock for a while now and he couldn't just turn his back on that, not now.

"I have to go, Scott's outside," he explained as his phone rang again. He ignored the blasting tune of Muse being thrown into the room from his phone as he tried to find his t-shirt and belt. He re-dressed quickly before pressing a kiss to Connors lips.

"Can't you just stay here tonight?" Connor mumbled against his lips, trying to deepen the kiss again before Dan pulled away easily, not wanting things to go any further, especially when Phil might need him.

"Can't, sleepovers have to be arranged when you're in care. Besides, I promised Scott I'd help him with Phil. We're going to go for pizza to cheer him up," He explained carefully, watching as Connors eyes narrowed at the sound of Phil's name. He didn't spare it a second thought, knowing full well that he would have a bitchy text off of Connor later for it (not that he cared about that anyway).

He rushed as quickly as he could out of Connors house, tripping down several slippery, rain sodden steps in his haste to see Phil. As soon as he saw the car he bolted to it, opened the door and sat next to Phil in seconds.

A tense silence surrounded them, "bad visit?" He whispered to Scott seeing how negative Phil's body language was, the raven haired boy had his arms curled around his knees on the seat and had his head down and shoulders tucked forward; the picture of despondence.

"That's an understatement," Scott whispered back, "you may as well come sit up here with me, he won't like it if you touch him right now." Dan's eyes narrowed at these words, just what the fuck had happened?

"I want to stay by Phil, I need too," Dan snapped. Scott should have known that he wouldn't want to leave Phil, especially when he was in this state. He looked nervously at the curled up boy next to him and looked back at Scott, noticing the reprimanding look on the care workers tired face.

"Sorry," he mumbled apologetically, a sheepish look spreading across his face  as Scott nodded understandingly. "It's just I'm a bit frustrated right now - I lost at Mario Kart and I never lose at Mario Kart," he fabricated a lie - not wanting to explain that he was pissed off at himself about the whole Connor situation.

"Stay with him if you want, Dan. Just don't get too close right now, I think he's sleeping because of the anesthetic and he'd probably freak out and hit you or something." Scott explained softly. Dan played with his hands nervously in reply, a habit he had picked up on from Phil -he wanted to stay by Phil but he didn't know if his close presence was doing any good for Phil right then.

He decided to stay with him, his best friend might need him and he didn't want Phil to think he was alone - but lent forward so he could still talk to Scott, "Why did he need anesthetic?"