'Date, Me.'

True love is letting go.

*Song: Like I Am Gonna Lose You by Jasmine Thompson

It echoes what we talked about earlier, 'obsessive love'. This is the solution.

I have to admit, I had the idea to write this chapter over a year ago, but I never managed to write about it because I didn't know how.

I set the title, something I heard from other gurus and knew to be true. However, I haven't had enough experience to write about it yet.

I have recently been through the most painful breakup I ever had to go through. It was hard for various reasons, such as being in a city where I barely knew anyone, but the main reason was the fact that we didn't break up because we stopped loving each other.

It was the opposite. We broke up because we love each other; it was because we knew it was the healthy thing to do.

I can't speak for her, of course.

I know I let her go because I love her, and I want her to find fulfilment in the journey that she needs to take on right now.

Trust me, it wasn't as easy breezy as it sounds now.

I had a two-day breakdown, not being able to see how the future was going to be better—

So much for my talk of self-love.

I realised, I fell into the pattern of building my life around my partner when I was in a relationship. (Obsessive much?)

All my single-lady independence flew out of the window. Pooh.

It was so easy to fall back into toxic habits.

So, I am truly grateful that this breakup helped me to recognise it, so I will be able to work on it.

And yeah, that was the unexpected gift for letting her go.

Like what they say, the ultimate form of love is letting go.

It is not only about literally letting someone go; it is also about having the mindset of 'I will be alright if I lose this person one day' even in a relationship.

You are truly free when you know that you don't need anyone in your life that much to the point where you feel like you cannot live without them.

For sure, you will be sad to lose someone you love, but it is not the end of the world.

Imagine, if you love someone unconditionally, would you want them to feel destroyed when you are not around?

No.

You would want them to mourn and then pull themselves back up.

You would want them to live a happy life, for themselves, and for you.

So, if you believe the other person truly loves you, being content even when you don't have the person around is the best thing you can do to reciprocate their love.

I am telling you and myself.

Plus, I always believe love carries on.

It is the greatest form of energy. It is endless.

In Love, when you let go of someone, you never really lose them.

I guess, all I am trying to say here is, in the process of learning to let her go, I found myself loving myself more.

I love the version of me that is doing my own things and being satisfied. I love how I can still feel my love for her, but I don't feel sad or heavy.

There is also a saying that is not necessarily correct, but I find very poetically romantic—

'All that is lost, is all that once was owned.'

In a twisted sense of this world of duality, you will never have someone or something if you never experience losing them.

Therefore, be brave and love.

Let go.