I've been reading the Qu'ran recently. The plan is to finish it. No idea when, though. It's my first serious attempt at reading a religious text, which is insane for a couple of reasons, being that A) I've grown up in devoutly Christian Alberta, and B) I'm deciding to start with the fucking Qu'ran. It reminds me of how I tried edibles before I ever even touched alcohol. Anyway, I've been obsessed with it for the past couple of days. I have no plans to convert, and the text itself isn't blowing me away so far despite being promised unmatched formal sophistication (James Joyce took a lot of notes from it for Finnegans Wake apparently). It's absolutely fascinating, though. The history of its translation is just as interesting as the text itself. I don't know how much you know about it, but the first thing anyone has to know about the Qu'ran is not reading it in Arabic is actually a massive no-no in most sects of the faith, so translating it into other languages is a contentious fucking enterprise, though it hasn't stopped people from trying. There's about a hundred different English translations, all through the lens of pretty much every sect of Islam. I'm reading the N.J. Dawood translation, who was this Iraqi Jewish guy who lived in Britain for most of his life. His translation is the most widely read in the English language, but one of the least faithful. He rearranged the fuck out of the chapters (Surahs) to put it into something close to a chronological order, which, if you know anything about how these texts were written, you know that's pretty much impossible, given how they're amalgamations of hundred years of other texts. He seems to get as close as you can.
One thing about it that has fascinated me, especially since I've been assigned to read a bit of Derrida, is the muqatta'at - roughly translating to something like the "mysterious letters." They're the sentences at the beginning of some of the Surahs that nobody fucking knows what they mean. Nobody. No one in Islam, no scholar, it's been a mystery for as long as they've been around. "Alif lam mim" is the first one I encountered, the first line of "The Cow." The standard explanation in Islam is effectively "trust me, bro" - Allah knows what they mean, so don't worry about it. That's another thing, the Qu'ran is very explicitly against being interpreted. The very beginning of "The Cow" tells you not to interpret it. Despite how admittedly illiberal this book and the faith at large is (snd I feel like the Western world doesn't talk about that maturely enough), I'll make it clear that this sentiment is complicated. Obviously, you're supposed to take it to heart. But it being mysterious and forbidden is endlessly tantalizing to me. It's perhaps the most interesting kind of thing to me: the ineffable, dark matter, negation, obscurity, etc. I cannot stop thinking about it. I bet this is how quantum physicists feel.
I need to elaborate on what I meant by the Western world not being mature enough about Islam. First thing's first, I am such a newbie at this religion stuff that it's not even worth listening to me. All of this is overwhelmingly new ground for me, so I don't want to pretend I have a ton of credence to talk shit. However, this is one thing I've been thinking a lot about: the notion that Islam is a "religion of peace." It seems kind of dumb to say that. Now, before I sell off any remaining credit for social consciousness I have left, I need to get a few things straight. California police monitoring mosques after 9/11, Trump's Muslim ban, beating up dudes in hijabs, etc. are all unequivocally monstrous. There's no but here. I don't care what Michel Houllebecq says (assuming anyone does). I just don't think it's entirely accurate or even empathetic, if I'm being entirely honest, to dilute the Islamic world through the lens of Western liberal democracy like progressives have since the turn of the millennium. What I think is important to accept is that it's complicated, and I mean that in the most uncomfortable sense of the word. Islamic societies seem just as grotesque as tons of right-wing psychos in the West give it shit for. My reading isn't doing a lot to persuade me against that. There is a lot of pretty gnarly shit in the Qu'ran. But again, it's complicated. This seems to be a situation where everyone on both ends of the political aisle is kind of correct. Islam seems pretty fucking violent and not at all in line with whatever we've decided the Western world to mean (depending on how you look at it), but all things considered, it has been adapted to effectively every culture. So it would be dense to characterize it as entirely incapable of hosting its own liberal communities. It obviously has. I live by a couple. It's complicated. Again, I'm completely new to this. My only goal is to learn here. I want to be open to anything.
That's another thing: during our Little Dark Age, I've arguably become more conservative. At least that kind of thing has become more compelling to me. But it's more accurate to say I've become more confused. Affiliations like this are really dumb. I can think of few things more reductive than reducing yourself to political adjectives, but for the sake of being clear, I'll play ball, so you know what I mean. Don't expect me to start voting Tory any time soon. My entire life, I've been surrounded by weirdos. It would be a deep disservice to them and myself to betray than in the interest of some bullshit notion of tradition, even if that kind of thing has become really interesting to me. To the transpeople, workers, non-white people, Global Southerners, ska-punks, shoplifters, and marginalized of the world, I'll always have your backs. I just have a lot of questions these days.
I was talking to this woman at the music club meeting last night. She had some amalgamation of a crust pants on, but was too clean-cut for me to call them that, despite her black lipstick. She was very loud, occasionally a little funny, but a bit too much. N---lie and J---an think she's annoying. She appeared to be from somewhere in West or South Asia, which narrows it down to 28 countries with a 2.3 billion people. I'm not good with ethnicities, especially as a white dude from Central Alberta. At the meeting, six of the thirty of us played songs on the stereo J--- had brought. All of them were really interesting and cool, most of which I've never heard before. This woman showed Teoman's "Rhapsodi Istanbul," which seems to be a relatively famous Turkish acoustic rock song. Some girl who was obviously Turkish she had a crush on was really into it. She said it was about "being fucking depressed. If you as many Turkish people as I know, you know that's kind of everyone. All my Turkish friends listen to Radiohead." This inspired a feeling of sonder I've been trying to hold onto ever since then. Disregard the implications of what I said about Islam. This is how I want to see the world.
To those Turkish kids who are not unlike my friends here in Canada, I am with you all.
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Few things I didn't make as clear as I could:
1. If Islamic societies are grotesque, wait until you hear about Christain ones. I live with the consequences of that every day, not only given the place I live with, but especially with the people I live with now, religious trauma and all. Now, it's inaccurate to say they're equally bad for the same reasons. But you get what I'm putting down, I assume. Civilization itself is generally a pretty horrific enterprise.
2. I don't want to die on the hill that Islam is violent. I know very little about it. It seems just as violent as any other Abrahamic faith, even if it's probably the strictest, despite the lack of a institutional hierarchy. The Qu'ran drives a pretty clear message of compassion. My interest here is being as honest, unmerciful, but empathetic as possible. I don't want to follow trends or fads or tow party lines anywhere. I want whatever the truth will give me, even if end up finding out something distasteful and uncomfortable. But I have a massive responsibility in doing this. Do you know what I mean?