Ineffable - S.REID

38

・゜゜・．TWO MONTHS LATER .・゜゜・

Spencer had a love hate relationship with his memory. He loved being able to remember the small things that people normally forget and the multitudes of facts she could memorise. But he hated how certain memories would never leave, he couldn't forget the things that some 'normal' brains forgot to protect themselves or simply because it wasn't important. He hated it the second they got called to a case at a bank with three serial killers that could kill with a single shot. He hated that he remembered her dream and the contents of it, whilst Clara seemed to have forgotten every detail. He watched her carefully during the briefing, for any ounce of recognition or panic within her eyes, but he didn't see anything. She didn't remember it and did not fear the contents. But he did, of course he did.

He watched her especially when Will (JJ's boyfriend) walked into the bank unarmed and got shot twice. He didn't see a flicker of recognition about the events that were horrible to witness. He thought that something like that would trigger her memory but it hadn't. He could not let himself focus on the case, nor how distraught one of his friends was, for fear that her life would be over the second she set foot in that bank. JJ was almost rocking back and forth as fear poured off of her, so intently that it silenced the room completely. "Did you see where he was shot?" JJ asked in the most monotone voice he had ever heard her speak with, face void of emotion and lacking any sort of colour. "Is he alive or dead Garcia?"

"He was wearing a vest. He might be okay," Emily reasoned hopefully.

JJ scoffed quietly, "Might be."

"They're not answering," Rossi, who walked into the armoured truck in which they were all sitting, revealed hurriedly.

"Right, we need to get inside."

"JJ, it's too risky," Morgan attempted to comfort but everyone knew it would have no effect from the look on her face. "We don't have eyes in there anymore."

JJ, choosing not to listen to a word, took one look at Hotch and whispered, "Aaron."

"Let's go in."

Spencer made a desperate attempt to stop Clara from entering the building with the others. He tried to grab her arm before she walked out but because Garcia was talking to him and everyone else was moving past him, there was no available opportunity. He told himself that it was just a dream, that nothing would happen, but did not believe it fully. Worry gnawed at him as he attempted to focus on the blueprints Garcia had pulled up.

Clara, finally noticing how familiar the entire scene felt as the hostages exited the building, chose to make that same choice. Just to hope that nothing would happen. She, Prentiss and a few members of the swat team, were assigned to enter through the side door. She was first though the door and blinked as her eyes adjusted to the darkness within the back room, only getting a few steps before Rossi yelled into her in ears.

However before she could even react, the bomb attached to the gas mains exploded. She felt herself get thrown backwards from the force of it, felt something collide with her head and something else with her stomach before everything turned black. Her consciousness went out like a light.

Spencer threw open the door to the armoured truck and ran in the direction in which she had entered the building, despite how many people yelled at him about how unsafe it was. He couldn't even hear them, the rapid beating of his heart blocked out all other sounds within his ears. "Clara!" he yelled desperately the second he entered the back room, coughing as smoke settled within his lungs. He could not see any sign of her through all the debris. He moved forward quickly, using his sleeve to cover his nose, as he searched in the darkness still yelling her name.