Urgent

Chapter 20

'It's just a simulation,' I tell myself. 'Just a simulation.' I have repeated the words to myself more times than I can count and yet each time, I just believe it less. Maybe it's because of how real the last one felt. Because of the nightmares which followed and now haunt me. Every time I doze off, I imagine myself drowning in a sea of blood. 

But I suppose the nightmares aren't quite as terrible opposed to reality, which is far worse. After all, in real life I won't be drowning in a sea of blood. It's irrational unlike my fear of being factionless which is impending.  

It doesn't reassure me, but it makes me it easier for me to close my eyes and let the darkness sweep me. 

...

I'm not sitting in a dark room. Four isn't by my side and I don't have a giant needle sticking out of my arm. Instead, I'm at the factionless sector of the city, standing by myself on the sidewalk.

The streets are strangely empty. There is no one, factionless or otherwise. I'm the only one here and it's daunting to be alone. Unsettling. 

Taking a deep breath, I begin to walk, my hands held stiffly at my sides as I do. My entire feels tense and I'm on edge for a reason I can't quite identify. Run away, the voice in my head screams, run far away. 

I ignore it and instead force my rigid, unwilling legs forward. I'm walking down a familiar street. A street which has become recurrent in my nightmares. It's the place that my parents died. 

I shake my head. My parents couldn't be dead - that's ridiculous. If they were dead, they wouldn't be standing in front of me... right? 

I look at the two people who are standing in front me. There's a man and a woman. The man is handsome and tall. He looks a lot like me. He has the same long nose, the same ears with the subtle points at the ends and his red hair is the exact same shade as mine. But then he also doesn't. He doesn't have freckles and his eyes are a light blue instead of green. 

The woman standing beside him looks quite different. She, does have freckles and is extraordinarily pale. She's a dark-haired beauty with hair as black as coal. She looks nothing like me, but we share so many features at the same. Like her freckles. Her smile. Her eyes. It's all familiar. 

Both of them are familiar. 

Because they're your parents, you idiot! 

I nod. They are my parents - how could they not be? It still feels strange to see them since I am fairly certain they are dead, but I try not to think too much of it. They're alive and that's all that matters. 

'Come on, Ari,' says the woman - my mother, I correct. Her voice is sweet and musical - exactly as I remember it. 

'Okay,' I say, not really thinking when I answer. I follow them down the street, not paying much attention to my surroundings. I feel oddly giddy at the prospect of walking with my parents down the street. 

They're dead! This. Isn't. REAL!

I frown but ignore the voice as I have been for the last few minutes. Instead, I look at my parents. I blink, not sure if I am hallucinating. 

'They're dead?' 

I probably should sound more hurt considering I'm looking at my dead parents - but I'm too confused to feel grief. It makes absolutely no sense for them to be dead when only a few moments ago they had been alive, smiling so kindly at me. 

They are both in a terrible condition with bruises and cuts all over their bodies, making me wonder just how they came to look like this. There's a huge wound in my father's stomach and a dent on the side of his skull. My mother looks almost worse, lying in a pool of her own blood. Her eyes, which are so like mine, are empty and lifeless.