Gabsile

Duduzane junior?

****Siyanda Simelani****

Courtney set a 4 a.m alarm so that we can sneak  out of the house without getting noticed by my mother  but we switched it off the minute it started ringing and only woke up at 8 a.m . My mother wasn't in so we rushed and promised our grumbling stomachs that we would grab breakfast at the mall. We stood in the scorching sun for 30 minutes as full taxis drove by and a good samaritan in a Toyota Hillux gave us a lift and refused to take our money because he was also heading to the mall.

At the mall we split , Courtney went to the food court and I went to clicks for that pregnancy test and as soon as I bought it I ran to the toilets where I used it and went to the food court without looking at the results because I needed my friend's support.

She  had already ordered some pizza  and before I could sit down she put out her hand and she asked to see it and when I gave it to her she shreaked, bringing unnecessary attention to us. She doesn't let me bite the pizza slice because she jumps up from the chair and hugs me . We stand in silence as the tears fall down our faces . I'm going to be a mother , Duduzane's baby mother.

****Duduzane Buthelezi ****

I call my girlfriend and she doesn't pick up so I call Courtney who also doesn't pick up and I call my girlfriend and her mother calls instead.' Sawubona Ma ...uhm is Siyanda at home?" I ask and she tells me that they left a note stating they had a thing they wanted at the mall and would be back in two hours , which was four hours ago and gives me directions.

I arrive at the mall and call Courtney who finally picks up and tells me to come up to the resturant on the outskirts of the mall for some family lunch and I go because I'm here and I'm  starving. Iv known Courtney longer than Iv known my girlfriend and I know when she is hiding something,and today she gives me this 'you don't know shit" look that makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand .

She grabs my girlfriends purse and excuses herself before I can sit down or even process her wierd behaviour . My girlfriend has this glow , like she is the happiest person on earth and I feel proud of myself because I am the reason she looks this happy , this radiant.

Instead of taking Courtney home before going with Siyanda to my hotel I leave her at the mall. Let's see if she will have that devious look when she has to go to the taxis after walking in the mall for hours. I hope she gets the rudest taxi driver who won't want to hear her utter a single Tswana word.

Once we are in my hotel room , Siyanda doesn't even let me close the door . She kisses me while unbuttoning my shirt and it ignites my fire . It turns me on and before we both know it she is bending over the small coffee station , bottomless with my length in her. Her moans are loud and I don't care , hotel walls surely aren't thin and her moans unleash a beast  in me that I had long tamed  and that beast makes me punish her for all those useless fights she has been starting.

****Siyanda Simelani****

I told my mother that I could be pregnant, I just couldn't hold myself and she asked me if I want to keep the baby, if this could be his first son or daughter and if I even know how he feels about children. I don't have all those amswers but I'm definetely keeping my baby . I'm keeping him or her so I can go up to Akhumzi's workplace and flaunt my baby belly , so he can see that he really was infertile after all.

My lovely friend called Sonini , Senzokuhle's wife and arranged a hightea in Ruimsig so we can get to know each other and share the good news. I am happy , not as happy as I should be because I've always promised myself to get married first and then have a baby , I wasn't raised in a lovely environment with both parents   and I wanted it for my child . I've hated the babymama and baby daddytittle but here I am , almost wearing mine.

I'm scared too , what if I miscarry , what if Duduzane and I break up before I give birth or even before I tell him ? My mood swings have gotten the best of me and I'm scared I might loose myself or him or our baby in the process. I met his parent's six weeks ago , won't they think of me as a gold digger , his dad was everything a  boy child needs in a father but what about his wife ? Women are always protective and mean spirited and...and 'oh my gosh" my mouth says before I can even stop it and I feel Courtney hugging me from behind.

I didn't even notice that i was  standing infront of my highschool pictures infront of Courtney. And I was soo lost in my thoughts and worries that I didn't realise I was crying. How long will my emotions settle? I'm going back to work next week , I can't be crying infront of my learners. 'Sii? It's okay , it really is , Du loves you , only you and he will definitely love your baby too" Courtney says softly.