Gabsile

The intervention

****Duduzane Buthelezi ****

Im woken up by a white man in blue uniform waving an A4 paper infront of me , I blink twice and see the police badge and obviously I start panicking because my first thought is something bad happened to Siyanda. I force my body up and cold metal lands on my hands.  That's when I realise whats happening.

****Siyanda Buthelezi ****

'This is the lowest of lows" he says with pain written all over his face. I finally got to make him feel an ounce of what I have been feeling. 'Wait for me to sleep with one of them" I say and they drag him out. I don't feel better , but im not falling apart like I did on the way to the police station.

****Duduzane Buthelezi****

They place me in a holding cell and I sit down and allow myself to cry. I feel like the world's greatest Moron . As im busy sobbing Ditswe , one of the cops im friends with passes by and probably spots me and he calls me. I wipe my eyes with my shirt like a ten year old child and go to him where he hands me his cellphone and I call Mpilo and Senzo to come fetch me. An hour later Im sitting in the car on my way home.

****Siyanda Buthelezi ****

I feel better as I step out in my pyjamas and go to the mall. Its a new day , it's a work day today but theres a teachers union meeting and im not going because I don't have clothes and im not in the right head space. I buy work clothes and a few lounge wear items for myself , ignoring the other customers staring at my pyjamas and I force myself to go look at children clothes and pick something for Xenzo.

As I park my car I see Mpilo sitting on the Range Rover's bonnet holding the red bow. I walk straight to him leaving my clothes in the car and when he sees me he looks up and hops off the boot. 'You know you don't have to look like your problems? I mean it's only 3p.m and you're in pink pyjamas " he says without greeting me.
'If you're here with regards for the apartment I can move out"
'Get in the car , we have things to talk about and somewhere to be" he says in his matter of fact voice as his eyes pierce my soul and his jaw flexes and I get in the car. He tosses the bow on the ground and hops into the drivers seat.

****Duduzane Buthelezi ****

My brothers organised a last minute family gathering of our three families so we can talk about our current situation and a way forward that doesn't include murder because according to them Siyanda will kill someone if things carry on like this. Mpilo said he would fetch her and I told him that she wouldn't budge but I hear car doors closing and I smile to myself a little bit , who knew our playboy clown had it in him to get the worlds most stubborn women to listern to him and take his orders ?

She walks in with sagging shoulders and a bowed head causing even Courtney to take a double. We are all shocked and I sneak in a small smile because it could well be my last smile given the circumstances of this meeting.

We greet each other and when she chooses to sit further away from me in the dining room Mpilo glances at her and she sits next to me .Mpilo stands up and starts talking.
'Senzo and I have decided to leave our very great and happy lives to intervene in what looks and feels like a war between people we saw exchange vows just months ago"
Kholofelo laughs and he glares at her. 'Buka nje , khona manje ngiya khuluma , a person that doesn't have much right to sit at this table let alone be here is laughing . This is the same women who put us in this situation , the same women who cooks Venda dishes at two a.m and wears Makotis clothes.'-Mpilo
'Baba Modau we respected your wishes irregardless of our feelings about everything but your daughter doesn't respect us , or our home. I  hardly wonder in their room , yene as a mere baby mama whose child we can decide to turn a blind eye on any time usi thata phi isbindi?"-Mpilo
'Her child isn't one from a planned marriage, she isn't entirely welcome here yet she talks to my girlfriend like   she could take away everything from her in a split second."-Mpilo

'Hawu I wasn't aware of her behaviour and treatment and im sorry about this " -Kholos father
'Mausithi sorry nothing changes , Mina as half the owner of this house I want her out first thing in the morning. I called our lawyer and once the child is born we will establish a trust fund and a bit of co parenting rules , pay for education , include the child in our family vacations , you know so he or she feels like a true Buthelezi , and you cannot argue with this ; we ensured she was welcome , and she acted like her true selve manje mina ngi khathele" - Mpilo.

****Siyanda Buthelezi ****

I watch the Modaus stand up from the table and go argue in the kitchen in awe. Mpilo pulled that off?wow. I can't help but live in the moment and smile a little. Her mother emerges from the kitchen and heads upstairs where I assume she begins packing.
He turns to me and my mother and uncles and I almost want to runaway. Im ashamed of yesterday's behaviour and I feel like a school kid being caught doing something she shouldnt be doing by the strict school principal.

'You two have a 4 month old baby, an infant and you're pressing charges , you're demanding divorces you're not communicating and you're having babies outside of your marriage?kanti when you put on each other's rings and said I do was it just for show? " he asks and I shake my head.
' Mama ka Siyanda ukhulise umfazi, imbali , umtu ono thando and im trully grateful for having her as a sister , but ngino mbuzo , ani mu layanga? Because yesterday I had to leave my warn bed nomfazi wam ngiyo khipha indoda yakhe in jail. Yes she pressed the charges and I understand that she is hurt but in all of these decisions that she takes which one involves her daughter? You're not going to take care of their child while they argue and fight and kill each other . I want us to talk as families that sat infront of each other discussing these two, yes ikhona i phutha , Duduzane is wrong but yini leh? "
Before anyone can answer Duduzane stands up and turns to me .'Mkami ngiyenze amaphutha. I didnt and I still don't want ingane yomVenda , it just happened and she stood rigid and decided to keep her baby , ngiyaku cela " and he goes down on both knees while taking my hand, ' can we talk this out and figure out things before we take decisions to divorce?" He says still on his knees.

****Duduzane Buthelezi ****

I watch as the tears form in her eyes and she presses both her lips into a line and just stares at me.
'Mina benginga yazi that Sii and Du were having problems , if it wasn't for today I would still be in the dark so ngiya bonga Mpilo but I dont think these problems require us sitting around the table blaming each individual for their shortcomings. Besides being her mother I understand why she gave him a restraining order , she is hurting and he is pushing , not giving her space to breath and think things through " - my mother
'Oh my son is hurting too , we understand why he went over in the first place , he has been trying to apologize for the past few weeks and your daughter rejected his apologies ,so naye she is wrong' - my mother-in-law
'Hayi qha sisi lapho keh uya bheda , a child isn't a mistake , lying to your wife and flying to Venda without even informing her isn't a mistake , bringing another strange women here because her father said so isn't a mistake and then buying gifts and sleeping in her apartment , hayi umKwhenyana u wrong " - my uncle
'I didn't call us all here to point fingers , can we please come with a solution, a way forward, I need Siyanda and Du to tell us what they want going forward " -Mpilo

****Duduzane Buthelezi ****

'I want my wife back " I say
'You can't just say that , theres another woman and her child , so you wont-" - my mother-in-law
'Going to therapy and seeing a marriage counselor will help"- my mother
'Does my daughter want to go to therapy ? Is she ready?"- my mother-in-law
'If she doesn't want to do it for him she has to do it for ingane '- my mother
'Ma? You don't come from the worlds most perfect marriage , can you stop taking defending Duduzane? I see bo wrong in Siyanda's actions and if you keep victim blaming we won't find a solution' -Senzo
'I think we should let the couple talk for themselves '- Sonini
'I'm not ready for a divorce or to be his wife , I just want to raise Xenzo and figure things out away from him" - Siyanda
'You want a break? For how long?"- Duduzane
'A year or two "
'A...a year? That's 365 days moes , Siyanda si shadile we said for better or for worse andI know I -"
'You're not in a position to tell me what you know , you're in a position to raise two kids while you figure out if marriage really is for you , you're in a position to call the nearest therapist and arrange a meeting ; you're in a position to fix the relationship you have with iVenda lakho so you can have a healthy co-parenting relationship , do not piss me off" Siyanda says as she stands up pushing her chair back . 'Ni saleni kahle" she says before leaving and when I try standing up to chase after her my father glares at me and I sit down.