Hidden and Silent (SpyxFamily)

Ch. 13: Part Three

Her heart stopped. Just metres away, he had halted in the middle of the aisle with his tray and Anya developed a cold sweat. Her mouth was sandpaper, dried like a fish in the desert, and her chest tightened with the air trapped inside.

It was Damian.

He looked away before their eyes could meet.

It was Damian, it was Damian, and Anya was petrified. Nauseous in her seat as she watched him near.

She didn't just hear that. He didn't just think it. Damian didn't know, he didn't, he didn't, he didn't. She had imagined it.

"Hey, Boss. You feeling better?" Ewen greeted as Damian joined with his lunch.

"Yeah." Damian didn't even glance in Anya's direction.

A lump didn't allow her to swallow. She was afraid to let her gaze fall from Damian as if watching him was a plausible plan of defence. As if it could erase what she'd heard. It couldn't be true.

Damian ate like nothing was wrong. His thoughts were empty of Anya or anything about her. His thoughts consisted of homework, classes, and his friends. . . a little too exclusively. No matter what was on his mind, there was always hints and traces of something else. But he stuck to one train of thought like a bike riding strictly on the curb and it wobbled, struggling to maintain balance. Anya wanted to believe she was mistaken and Damian made it very difficult to deny it.

He knew.

The blood drained from Anya's face. Her left hand clamped her seat's edge as if it could steady her skyrocketing heart rate.

"Anya!"

She jolted again, whipping her head to Becky who flinched back in turn. "What's up with you? I said your name four times." Becky said, glancing between Anya's upset dish and Damian.

Anya had been staring at him and it had to be a bad thing when Becky made no comment on it. Her friend sighed. "Hang on, I'll ask for someone to come clean it up." She got down and left.

Damian glanced innocently between Anya and his friends as if he didn't know what was going on. His seemingly genuine ignorance might have given Anya pause, but she could hear it. The tiny, muffled voices hidden in the back of his head like they'd been shoved in a box. Anya couldn't clearly make them out, but she knew Damian didn't want them to escape. He was hiding them. From Anya.

"Um. . .are you okay?" Emile gave her a funny look.

Anya could hardly breathe and she inhaled shakily through her nose. Again. Her chest hurt. It was collapsing in on itself and her heart was trying to escape through her throat. Was this what a heart attack felt like? It certainly felt like it was attacking her. Her ribcage rattled from the shake in her chest as it was crushed underneath ten tons of hot coals, burning her skin and pulverizing her ribs. It cut off her air and she gasped desperately as her near useless, slow, heavy limbs clumsily fumbled her down from her seat.

"Forger?" Damian rose to his knees and leaned over the table.

Anya ignored him. She couldn't focus. She couldn't calm herself down. She couldn't believe this was happening and her lungs felt about ready to burst. Her emotions filled them with sharp, wet gravel and pressed at the back of her throat, unsuccessfully attempting to escape and blocking airflow. Using the bench to steady herself, she walked along it, heaving periodically as she lost more and more breath. Her awkward, disobedient limbs would let her fall on her face if she tried to run.

"Wait! Forger!" Unfortunately, Damian got down too and ran around the table to her side.

No, no, no, she shuddered. She couldn't deal with this. She couldn't deal with him. Her biggest secret—

She dropped to her knees before Damian could reach her and crawled under the table. Her chest heaved faster with empty, useless air, splashed with a spurt of inadequate relief that left far too quickly. She focused on the dusty tiles beneath her fingers, though she still felt wobbly and her eyes began to leak.

"Wh—Forger!" Damian had caught up and kept pace with her from the outside.

How could this happen?! Anya thought to herself. She had been so careful and people were always dumb enough to never figure it out!

But Damian didn't bother to lock his thoughts down anymore and she heard glimpses of what had happened.

It was Demetrius' fault.

The floor became blurry as droplets hit Anya's hands. Her head was fuzzy and her sapping strength slowed her mission to exit the cafeteria. Her muddled senses made it hard to think straight and her muscles draggled along painfully sluggishly. The air didn't seem to exist in her immediate area and her lungs cried for it, her chest ached for it.

Damian knew.

He knew, he knew, he knew, and everything was over! She'd have to flee the country and change her name! Her parents would be looked into and she'd have to leave them to protect their secret identities!

Her focus that remained on movement was subverted to the dizziness in her head and the cracking pain in her chest. She found herself stopping to lean back on her heels, braced her hands on the floor, and suddenly Damian was in front of her like a bad dream that wouldn't leave her alone. Anya avoided his gaze and dazedly looked side to side for a way out. She was gonna throw up.