Through The Veil「 The Veil Trilogy Part Ⅱ 」✔

[41] Sorrow And Mourning

Professor Dumbledore had returned to the school and resumed charge as the Headmaster of Hogwarts. He came to the Hospital Wing as well to check up on the students who had gotten hurt in the attack at the Ministry, allowing them to go home early.

I was mechanically going through everything that was happening around me, looking after Ginny and Ron who had just recovered. Harry was in a no different state than mine as he too was very stricken with grief.

I wanted to give the poor boy a tight hug but what could I say that would be of assurance to him? 

Nothing.

And so I chose to speak nothing at all, putting up with everything robotically until I would finally reach home. I just wanted to go to my room, lock the door, and stay inside until the chaos inside me reached some calm.

I could still not believe that Sirius was dead. So I just pushed it into a corner of my mind, shutting everything out.

I couldn't live in denial forever, I knew that very well, but just for the time being when so much was happening around me, I could shut it all out.

It would hurt far worse when I would finally allow all that sorrow to seep in but at least I wouldn't be in the school where everyone would be shocked at why I was reacting like that. But then I would be at home and even though my family, especially Mum, would get worried for me, at least it would not cause as much havoc as it could if I gave up right now.

Focusing only on that thought, I kept myself going. For my siblings' sake, for my family's sake, for everyone's sake but my own...

Ginny had been sticking close to me ever since that small outburst in which I had admitted that I had had a vision about Sirius' death. I don't know if she felt sorry or if she was genuinely worried for me but so far, she wasn't avoiding me like the plague.

If only things hadn't been that awful, I would have been happy to see her starting to accept me.

We were finally sent back to the burrow. Dumbledore had arranged the thestral carriages for us that transported us quite quickly.

It was said only those people could see thestrals who had seen death. Personally, I hadn't seen anyone's death but I had had visions so perhaps that also counted in seeing death.

Ever since the time I had envisioned Cedric Diggory's death through my ability to glimpse into the future, I was able to see those magnificent winged creatures pulling our carriages. 

By the time we got home, Mum engulfed the three of us in a tight hug. She had been extremely worried for Ron and Ginny who were involved in the battle at the Ministry so I took the chance and slipped away to go to my room.

I needed some time to myself. And I had to be away from them all to deal with the mess that my heart and soul were caught up in. 

I knew the twins would eventually find me and try to figure out ways to cheer me up but for as long as I was alone, I wanted to mourn.

***

Days, weeks, months, was I really keeping track of time?

Sometimes it felt as if a long time had passed since that dreadful day that I had had a vision of Sirius getting swallowed by that veil. And sometimes it felt as if it was just yesterday and all the sorrow and pain was fresh.

I really wasn't keeping track of anything.

A lot happened though in all the time that was passing insignificantly for me. Fleur came to stay with us at the Burrow, Fred and George were always around, Ginny too spent time with me, Percy had also visited often and Mum and Dad were very worried for me.