Falling Under

𝟚𝟘. ℕ𝕖𝕨 𝔹𝕖𝕘𝕚𝕟𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤

The next few weeks just blurred into one, it's like I wasn't even living anymore. Life was just happening all around me and I was stuck. It had been the usual, swimming , school, parties. Jason invited me to loads of parties, all the popular kids were there, it was weird my social status had somewhat changed. I had nothing better to do so I went, I left every party high, drunk or both, mostly unable to remember anything from that evening. I just didn't care anymore. I'd come to the realisation that nothing really mattered.

The entire group all had girlfriends, except me, they tried to set me up with this girl, but I don't think she actually liked me. I also didn't think I liked her either. So I wasn't exactly surprised when we stopped talking after a while.

Christmas came and went, we visited our grandparents, I got to see my cousins and my family. It was okay, I spent the majority of the time by myself. I didn't like family gatherings.

For New Years Jason had a party, the majority of the year was there, including Jess and her friends. They'd openly hate him but still come to his party.

I was honestly wasted and there were so many people. I found it hard to concentrate.

"Seven, six, five, four-" I looked around during the countdown, Jason was getting ready to kiss his girlfriend Isabel, they were cute I guess, but his girlfriends never lasted. In the final few seconds, this girl turned my head and placed her lips on mine, we made out as the clock turned midnight.

My first New Years kiss. I still felt exactly the same, I thought it'd be a special moment or something.

"Happy new year" she drunkenly cheered to me, and she went off into the crowd. I didn't even know who she was.

"Did I just see you kiss Kylie?" Tommy asked me,

"That's who she was"

"Yeah, she's Jason's cousin" shit.

"She kissed me"

"It's cool bro. Go find her, maybe go further"

"No" I didn't want to, she was drunk and probably just wanted kiss someone on New Years and I happened to be there. I wasn't expecting anything more.

"Okay then" I went to the drinks table and took another tequila shot before grabbed a beer. It was a new year but nothing had changed. I was so tired.

Later on I sat on the couch next to Jason and Seth, they were doing coke. I'd never done coke before, I knew that Lucas had, he'd done a lot of drugs but I was too scared to try them and I'm not sure he would've let me. I'd only ever smoked weed and that was it. Even that was risky, Lucas almost greened out once.

"Do you want a line?" Jason asked me.

"Yeah" I said with no hesitation. New year new me. I was slightly nervous but I might as well try it. I watched as he used his card to draw me a line. I held down my nostril and used a straw to snort it.

"Woah" I said, leaning back, it hit me immediately. I wasn't expecting that, I felt incredible. I hadn't felt this good in a while.

"It's good isn't it" Jason said,

"Yeah, it's so good"

"Do you want another one?"

"Yeah but that's it"  I didn't want to take too much in one go. Plus I was already wasted. I snorted the other line. It was weird, I felt genuinely happy and had much more energy.

"Another?" He asked, I shook my head. "More for me" Jason said, snorting another line.

"You should slow it down" Brad said to him.