'~WARSICK: Behind The Mask~' Jefhalo Edition-Book 2

I

Nikki's POV:

My fingers were tangled within my hair, the palms of my hands on my forehead. I couldn't bear the fact knowing my brother was dead. I had so many questions. Why had he followed the path he did? Why did he follow . . . him. He knew I disliked him and so many others did too, . . . so why would he follow him . . . ? He did have royal blood too, so . . . why wasn't he considered at least a royal? Did anyone even know he was related to me; that he was my brother? That he had royal blood?

What would have happened if people knew of him having royal blood? Would he have chosen a different path for himself? Why was he treated the way he was? Why did he have to be the way he was? Why did he have to be evil?

"Why, . . . why'd you do that?" I ask silently. "None of this would've happened if you just listened to me . . . if you didn't follow his ways . . ." I had locked myself in a bathroom so no one would see me like this. I didn't want anyone to know that me, retired Queen Nikki, had problems. Royals were the people you'd least expect to stress and have problems. I mean, we royals have everything we could ever wish for.

If I ask for something, anything, I'd get it. But the happiness from all of that is just a distraction from everything else in your life that went wrong. If you didn't appreciate and cherish someone when you had them, you shouldn't cry when you lose them. So, why am I crying? I never really went out of my way to even visit him . . . Now I regret that. I wish I talked to him and wasn't so caught up in trying to be the perfect queen for the Juniper kingdom.

I tried, but I knew deep down that I'd never be the perfect queen, and that's simply because perfect queens don't exist. When I visited my brother's grave last week, I couldn't help but notice the fact that there were no flowers there or visitors. He would have flowers and people visiting him most likely if he didn't follow the path he did.

I feel like it's partly my fault. I neglected him. I didn't pay the attention I should've to him when I had him. Maybe if I did, he wouldn't have chosen this path for himself. Even though I knew what he had done, I wanted to bring him back, . . . to resurrect him. And I knew how. 

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Word count: 457