"N-No... don't stop. Don't fucking stop." I replied and hugged him tightly, my voice thick with desperation and longing for him but I don't fucking care now. "I want this and I want you....Now."
"I-I....I can't do this to you but. It would be...just...
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Author's pov:
Smith stood at the balcony, staring ahead while questioning his life's decisions. A coffee cup was in his hands and the other cup was kept on the nearby table. The other cup of coffee and him, both were desperately waiting for her though one of them knew that she won't come. But still, there is this little hope inside his heart which just doesn't give up.
His coffee was half finished and so was the steam of another coffee cup, when he heard some noise. He turned around and saw her. She was standing behind him but quickly walked away from there and entered the kitchen.
He wanted to go behind her and talk, but he doesn't even know what to say to her. He doesn't know if he wants to fix this or live like this only, because neither he was content earlier when he thought he was doing wrong with Beverly nor now as he thinks he is doing wrong with Ally.
And after all, it was him only who impelled her away from him. He created this huge gap between them, without knowing whether he'll ever be able to lessen it or not.
Maybe he can or maybe he can not.
His placed his empty coffee cup on the table when he saw her coming outside the kitchen with a water bottle in her hands. She was about to leave for her room when he called her.
"Ally?"
Her body went stiff and she stopped. She didn't want to but his gentle voice was enough to make her weak. Though, she didn't turned around and waited for him to speak.
"Atleast look at me sweetheart." The words fell out of Smith's mouth unknowingly and she finally turned around with a tired sigh. A faint smile appeared on his face but he was quick to mask it. He was happy that she at least listened to him because he knows that after what he did, she might not be able to trust his words ever again but maybe after seeing the genuineness on his face she understands him.
But understand what?
What does he want her to understand?
Is he ready to share all of his past now? All the constant wrestling between his conscience and his heart or the overwhelming guilt which is grueling him from inside.
"Are we going to stare each other for the rest of the night? If yes, then I'm not fascinated to play this game." Alysia's voice pulled him out of his thoughts. Her tone, cold and apathetic sent a pang of pain to his heart but he tried his best to not mind it.
He asked. "Care to have a drink with me?" He actually wanted to talk but she might say no to it directly, so he went for this.
"No." She flat out rejected and turned around without bothering to give him any explanation.
"Ally?" Smith called her again but she closed the door of her room, shutting the outside world completely.
Feeling utterly defeated, he came back to his room and lay down on his bed.
