Behind the Scenes: World Cup 2023

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery

15th November, India vs New Zealand

"You did not win the fashion show outfit-wise," half a dozen voices yelled at Shreyas when he returned from an impromptu interview with Sunil Gavaskar and Mayanti Langer, the Star Sports post match anchors.

"Of course I did," said Shreyas.

"Funny, because I don't remember that happening," said Jassi. "Do any of you?"

A chorus of 'No's was followed by Kuldeep's, "I won."

"What?" said Ishan in disbelief. "You did not win, I won."

"Yeah right," said Shardul. "I won."

"You won the ramp walk," said Shreyas. "I told them you won the ramp walk."

"I won both."

"You didn't," said Jassi. "I won outfit-wise!"

"How can you all just lie like that?" demanded Ishan.

"Exactly," said Shreyas.

"You included!" said Ishan.

Rohit had the misfortune of passing by at that point.

"ROHIT BHAIYA!" everyone hailed.

Rohit dropped his bat in alarm and wondered if he should run while he still had the chance. Before he could, though, he had been swarmed.

"Tell them I won the fashion show outfit-wise, Rohit bhaiya!"

"They're all lying and denying my victory, Rohit bhai!"

"Shreyas lied on air, Rohit bhaiya!"

"I did not lie--I won, didn't I, Rohit bhaiya?"

Rohit tried to back away unsuccessfully. At the very least, he tried his level best not to look at any of them in the eye, because they were all giving him their best tragic, pleading, innocent looks. Good that Shubman, at least, was not there, having gone for the press conference.

"As far as I remember," said Rohit, treading cautiously, "no one won outfit-wise, because the judges had such differing opinions."

"I won!"

"I won!"

"I won!"

"Yes, neither of you winning is equivalent to all of you winning," said Rohit hastily. "All of you won, isn't that nice?"

"I won alone!" "I won alone!"

Now Rohit succeeded in backing away two steps...three steps...

"I won alone!" "Liar!" "You calling me a liar?"

...five steps...six steps...

Then Rohit turned tail and ran.

"Rohit bhaiya!" wailed a lot of voices behind him, voices he chose to ignore, because honestly, he had had enough in the past month and half for a lifetime.

__________________

"Virat bhaiya," Shubman's anxious voice broke Virat away from his phone call to his mother.

"How was the press conference?" Virat felt a soft, warm burst of pride at the thought of his kid doing adult stuff like attending post match conferences.

"It was okay, but...was there any controversy about the pitch?"

"Hm," said Virat grimly. "Stupid stuff. I hope you didn't comment."

"I didn't," said Shubman. "I just asked what the controversy was, but no one wanted to describe--"

Virat choked. "You asked the media guys what the controversy was?"