If Only

Chapter Forty-Two: Twin Flame

A/N: Is it too much to say... that since this is an MGK fanfiction, that you listen to this song while reading this chapter? "Twin Flame" by the man himself. It just felt like he was really singing it to Jade. OMG I'm ugly crying right now. Aight, enjoy y'all! We're down to 8 chapters left! I'm so not ready for this to end. AND I ACTUALLY NAMED THE CHAPTER AFTER THE SONG!!! OKAY I'LL STOP NOW.

It was Jared.

My eyes widened, threatened to overflow with disbelief, as I gazed at the figure leaning against the tree. A profound shock paralyzed me for a moment, rendering me motionless. It took precious seconds for the realization to sink in that I could move, and my immediate instinct was to pivot around, my heart pounding, desperate to escape the overwhelming presence that stirred a storm of emotions within me.

What's going on?

Seconds later, I sensed Jared trailing me with determined strides, his voice reaching out, calling my name.

"Jade," he uttered.

I couldn't comprehend the sudden compulsion that seized me, causing me to halt in my tracks.

All this time without seeing or hearing from Jared, my name sounded unfamiliar as it left his lips.

I turned around slowly to face him, unable to meet his eyes directly. There was a considerable distance between us, for which I was grateful. Yet, the mere presence of this man was undoing all the progress I had made, a feat I had compelled myself to achieve.

From the corner of my eye, I noticed changes in his appearance. The small bun that used to sit at the back of his head was no more, and his hair had grown out, cut in a way that brought him back to the look he had the first time we met.

"I-I'm sorry... Look, I just came here to grab a package from Lizzy. I told Chandler I'd swing by, pick it up, and head straight home..." The words escaped hastily, creating an odd distance between myself and the place that, by rights, bore my name.

He lowered his gaze, as if weighing the words to utter next.

"I, um... there's actually no package..." he stumbled over the words.

"What? What do you mean?"

"That doesn't matter, but... I came here to talk to you..." he spoke, lifting his gaze to meet my eyes, which I instinctively avoided upon contact.

My heart constricts at the sight of him. It's as if every ounce of pain I've been battling so hard to suppress comes rushing back. The walls I painstakingly constructed to shield myself crumble, and suddenly, we're back to that fateful night.

"What is going on?"

"I need to talk to you..." The Jared before me seemed different, devoid of his usual confidence, beaten, and without a trace of his usual cocky demeanor. It seemed like he was... overwhelmed? With the situation.

"I-I'm sorry. I'm gonna go..." I spun around once more, my resolve fixed on reaching the end of the gate. The emotions I'd been holding back crashed onto my chest, bringing forth tears that strained against the confines of my tear ducts.

Even though I was supposed to retrieve something for Lizzy, all I wanted in that moment was to escape, to put as much distance as possible between me and this place. I teetered on the edge of breaking down any moment now, and the last thing I wanted was for anyone here to witness me in this vulnerable state.

I aggressively wiped away the tears out of frustration.

Jared swiftly caught up to me when I was just a few steps away from the gate. This time, his fingers gently wrapped around my forearm, not forcefully pulling me back, but the contact sent sparks dancing within the pit of my stomach.