When The World Caves In |C.G.

twelve

We have a funeral for Dale the next day. Last night I didn't sleep a wink. Daddy didn't say nothing about Carl dragging me to watch Randall nearly die and I'm appreciative of that. I think after everything that happened last night, he's chosen to let it go. 

We're standing by Dale's grave. This one really hurts, especially since he died thinking everyone thought he was wrong about Randall. He was an honest man, a good man. We had just seen him right before his death. This world just ain't fair. 

The sun is a pale orange in the sky, slowly rising above the tree line during Dale's funeral. I like to think that it's Dale going up to Heaven, or whatever he believed in. I'm not really sure if he believed in the big man in the sky. I'm not really sure if I believe in him.

Rick is speaking about Dale and Carl is crying  quietly next to me.I just listen quietly, thinking about what we've lost recently. Sophia, Dale, losing them hurts. I don't think losing someone will ever not hurt though.  

I look over at Daddy, he's just staring at Dale's grave. I wonder if he feels guilty, he had to kill Dale while he was dying. He'd be dead anyways, but Daddy sped up the process. He put him out of his suffering though. It's a weird thing, knowing my Daddy killed a man. Even if it was to help him out.

I hope I'll never have to kill someone, ever. I don't think I'd be able to live with myself. Knowing you took someone's life would be hard on anyone. I also hope that Daddy won't have to ever again.

"He said 'this group was broken'. The best way to honor him is to un-break it." Rick says. 

___

"Gonna be tight," Rick tells Hershel. "14 people in one house." 

"Don't worry about that." Hershel tells us. "With the swamp hardening, the creek drying up.."

"With 50 head of cattle on the property, we might as well be ringing the damn dinner bell." Maggie states and I can't help but agree with her. The walker that killed Dale was munching on steak before he decided Dale tasted better. 

"She's right. We should've moved you in a while ago." Hershel says. 

Rick starts arranging a plan to have each vehicle by the doors facing the road, just incase things go South. As well as setting up lookouts along the farm. We're worried about Randall's group coming through, Daddy's going to be keeping watch with T-dog.

Him and Rick are going to cut Randall loose later too, I don't think Shane likes that idea as much. Daddy puts his stuff on the bike, and tells me to hop on. I swing my leg over the side and hold on tight. It's a short ride up to the house, but I like being able to ride up on the motorcycle. Makes me feel real cool. 

"You see my gun anywhere?" Daddy asks when he helps me off the bike. "Can't seem ta find it." 

"Nope." I tell him with a shrug. I really haven't seen it, I don't know why he'd think I'd know anyways. I'm not supposed to touch it without his permission.

 "Alright, I'm gonna go fortify the shed." He tells me patting my back gently. "Get our stuff set up will you?" 

"Yeah I can do that Daddy." I tell him, grabbing my backpack off of the bike. I help Lori unload the truck and pile all our stuff into a corner of the living room. It's right by a window, I know Daddy like's seeing what's out there. 

I'm spreading a blanket out over the floor in the corner of the room when Carl comes over to me. He doesn't say nothing but helps me arrange Daddy and I's sleeping bag's across the floor. Daddy's is closest to the door, something I've done out of habit, his habit. 

Both our Daddy's are on the porch, talking over a map. I'm assuming they're talking about Randall when I see Shane pull up to the house in the green car. Daddy says something to Rick and comes inside, giving the other two men some privacy.