Don't underestimate me (suicidal Deku)

Strange 2

Izuku POV 

Unknown for a while later

My eyes opened, I looked around anxiously and breathed heavily. Where was I? What happened?

Stain: So you woke up?

I looked at him puzzled.

Stain: Answer! I see that you are awake?

I: Yes

Stain: Why are you here sending the heroes now? Small children?

He thinks I'm a spy for the heroes. I answer and shake my head quickly.

Me: No, I wanted to run home. Where am I? ... What time is it?

I looked frantically around where I was. It was the same place where I passed out, only that I was lying on a few clothes. I rubbed my eyes Stain sits in front of me and examines me.

Stain: I ask the questions child.

Me: Okay

Stain: What is your quirk?

Me: I am Quirkless Sir.

Stain: Hmm makes sense. You don't make any danger. Otherwise you would be dead already boy. ... Can you stand up child?

Me: Yes, yes, I'm fine.

Stain: Your wrist says something else.

I opened my eyes wide. Why did he see my wrists? Why Ic is on the verge of a panic attack. I look at him with wide open eyes. I can only say one word that my voice feels hoarse.

Me: Why?

Stain: Should I let you bleed to death here on the floor?

Maybe he should miss who will miss me except my mother no one, no person. Maybe Kacchan will still remember me and maybe his mother, who was always nice to me. Other people will forget me, but. Everyone will remember the weak loser. Everyone says that I am useless and would best be dead. Kacchan had given me a few Spider liliys and every day someone puts these beautiful flowers on my desk. You are really very pretty. In the beginning I was sad, but now I almost always wear one in my hair. Stain saw my sad face and asked.

Stain: Did you want to bleed to death? Did you want to die?

Ouch, he probably never heard anything about asking nice or not addressing sensitive topics.

Me: No... Yes... no... Yes... Maybe

Stain: Oh, forget it and go?

I get out quickly and almost fell again. Only then did I realise that the light shines through the broken windows.

Me: How long was I unconscious?

He looks angry and annoyed

Stain: far too long.

Me: I'm so sorry to have caused problems... my name is Izuk...

Stain: I don't want to hear him. This meeting and this conversation never took place, we never met.

Me: Okay, got it.

Satin: The dagger is in your yellow pocket.

Me: Thank you, bye.

Stain: Get out of my sight.

Was that funny? Why didn't he kill me? I deserved it, didn't I? Or? People only help if they can get something out of it. So what did he want from me I'm useless and people are nice and helpful if they can take advantage of someone. What is he planning. Am I thinking too much? I bite my lip, I go out and try to orient myself to get home. I was about 15 minutes away from home and after the sun was about 6 o'clock. I started running again. Most puddles are dried and there are only a few puddles left small puddles the shards shine in the rays of the sun and the ugly part of the city looks incredibly pretty. There were no cars because of the shards on the roads and therefore the air is incredibly clean and the atmosphere is quiet.

I came home after which I had been missing for so long. I rub my shoes on the carpet that is in front of the apartment door. My hands tremble as I get my keys out of my bag and try to get the key into the keyhole more times. I enter and call with hope.

Me: Mom, I'm at home.

It remains silent, I don't hear anything. The house is as deserted as ever. I can't lie to myself. My mom is not interested in me. I went to the living room, I didn't care that I walked through the house with dirty shoes. I reached the coffee table there was a small letter. I saw him from tears forming in my eyes. My mom did it again, she left me. I open the letter and read.

For my beloved son (Green Bean)

I'm so sooooo sorry, but I won't be there tomorrow and the day after tomorrow. I hope that you will have it well without me. I will have an interview in a very important company. When I am back, we will move together to a larger apartment or house. Your father will certainly get jealous when he sees me as a reporter on TV. It will definitely be great and I will put so much effort into getting the job for both of us. Wish me luck. Money is in the kitchen, buy something nice to eat and some nice things for you. Think of it as an apology.

In dear mother.

I wish I could burn the note. That's 54 times she goes to find a job. All her apology notes and the remaining money I have to buy something nice is in my drawer. I don't want to accept her apology. Sometimes I buy a notebook or a pen for my notes about quirks, but that's all. I always feel bad afterwards. I pack my yellow backpack with the things we need and go to get a new school uniform. But before that, I had to do something else. I go to the bathroom and get my phone in the phone case I had a blads. I pull my sleeve up and see bandages, I see other arms, he is also wrapped in bandages. Was that stain? That's why he saw my wrists. I'm not interested now.

I tear the bandages off my wrists, I made a lot of small cuts. But I started to cut deeper and deeper. I still look down at my arm at the blood ring and I smile cheerfully. It calms me down when I see the blood running down from my arms. I watch the life fluid leave my body. Hmm, I made 60 light cuts, 30 medium and 10 deep cuts. This means that with the 100 cuts I lose as much blood as with 30 deep cuts or as with 180 light cuts. The cuts were not everywhere on my arm as you would imagine. I had placed them perfectly next to each other. Each cut had the same length, only the depth was different. On one arm I made all the deep cuts and on the other all light and medium. I know it's stupid, but it gives me the feeling of being able to control at least something.

I couldn't control where Kacchan beat me and I couldn't control what people physically hurt me like the whole school or metal like my mother. I can hardly determine what happens to me in life, I can only control whether I live or not.