More Than a Teacher - Ashton Irwin

14

"Good morning students."

Mondays.

The day I've grown to hate and dread.

I look rough today. I'm too mentally and physically exhausted to bother putting effort into my appearance. I have more consuming thoughts to worry about than how I look. I'm over it, over trying to be ok.

I haven't showered in two days. I don't like to waste people's water. They shouldn't have to pay more for the water bill because I'm showering at their place. Instead I drench myself in deodorant and fragrance. My hair is so dry and is messily thrown up with strays flying everywhere. My dark circles are prominent on my pale face but surprisingly my skin is pretty clear.

I groan as work gets put up on the whiteboard but I tug the hood of my school hoodie over my head. I thread my earphones under the shirt and up into my hood so that it rests in my ear without anyone knowing. I just want to sink into my own world and ignore everything around me. It all just seems to be negative anyways.

Watching what's going on in the class around me, I have no idea what is being said or taught. All that I am paying attention to is my music that overpowers everything.

And so I do this majority of the day, even through lunch with Michael, Luke and Elle. As of last week we decided to sit together as a group of four and it's been much more entertaining than my old group of gossiping girls. Seriously, there's more to life than worrying about what Angie Williams wore to a party that happened a week earlier.

I travel from class to class like a literal zombie, not even in the mood for anyone to speak to me or even acknowledge me. I don't want to be touched, I don't want to be looked at and I don't want to make conversation with anybody.

I shuffle hunched over into the last period, moving up the back of my math class with Mr Irwin. He shines me a soft smile as he always does and continues to get rowdy students to settle into their seats.

Ten minutes into the lesson Michael and Luke are making life hard for him, saying his answers on the board are wrong and smirking to themselves as Irwin spends another five minutes redoing the question only to find out it is correct.

I can barely keep my eyes open let alone focus on anything. I try to fight my tiredness, not wanting to give into sleep as I've done too many times before. My head becomes heavier and I'm leaning closer to the table until eventually my face is resting in my hoodie clad arms. I'm in deep now. Not a chance of waking me anytime soon.

•

"Ava," The voice softly speaks. "Ava?"

A grunt leaves my lips, awaking from my much needed slumber. I fell asleep again?

My head immediately snaps up realizing the voice belongs to Mr Irwin and he's leant against the chair of the desk in front of mine. I drowsily peer around, blinking my blurry eyes to notice the rest of the class is empty meaning the home bell must have rang. Fuck, not again.

"I'm so sorry I—" I frantically say, embarrassed I've fallen asleep yet again. I really am a disappointment.

"Don't worry. It's partially my fault. I can never bring myself to wake you up." He presses his pink lips together.

Exhaling audibly, I lazily rub my eyes and gaze down to the screen on my phone to notice the
time.

"Shit, I'm so sorry I've kept you behind. It's twenty minutes past the bell." I gasp feeling guilty.

Not wanting to waste any more of his time, I briskly stand and swing my bag over my shoulder; however, I don't get far. His hand curls around my shoulders creating confusion as I look up at his comforting hazel eyes.