More Than a Teacher - Ashton Irwin

71

Ashton

It's the eighth day she's been here in the hospital and just four days since we've been reunited.

Four days since the beginning of our new life. One that we can build together and stronger than ever before.

Things may be a little different to what they were before but that doesn't change the love I hold so deeply for her.

Fixing isn't my job anymore. It was never intended to be but her situation reminded me of what I've been through and I thought I could solve her pains on my own. I'm sure I've made an impact on her, but completely healing her is something I'm incapable of. She needed professional help and that's what she's finally getting.

As for myself, I'm going back to getting professional help. When I left my last therapy session a few years ago I thought I'd never look back and that I'd be cured from my mental issues for the rest of my life. As those years crept by I soon realized that mental health isn't about curing, it's about managing and maintaining. In order to do that, you must check in and be honest with yourself. Get help when you feel yourself losing control. I completely stopped doing this when Ava moved in.

By all means, this is not her fault, it's mine and this last month has been a massive learning curve for me. This is why things might be somewhat different between us, we are helping ourselves before tending to each other's issues.

I know it will be challenging for me because it's in my nature to want to solve and take away any ounce of pain from the ones I love. I am, however, excited to watch us grow and flourish and see what life brings.

I wince as I sit on the plastic chair in the corner of her room, watching the nurse from a distance taking out the feeding tube that has been down her nose the past week. My face scrunches up the best it can considering the bandaging I have across my healing nose. Her eyes are tightly creased closed as the tube is drawn out of her throat. The thought alone is enough to make me want to gag so I have no idea how she's so still.

She's put on a decent few kilograms in such a short time. Some much needed weight which with her program from the hospital dietitian will promise to build her up to full health. Although the difference isn't so physically noticeable yet, the life has been reinstalled into her eyes, her skin is bright and plump and she has this subtle glow about her.

Ava dryly coughs a few times as the end of the tube is gently pulled out her nose. She turns her head to me, blinking her watery eyes away as she beams a toothy smile.

She's so glad the tube is removed and no longer has to be adhered to her cheek. She didn't like having it on her face as she persisted that it made her look weird and sick. She's always so hard on herself no matter what it's about. With or without the feeding tube she's lgorgeous nonetheless. I don't just say that, I'm utterly in love with her and everything she does. She's the prettiest woman I've laid my eyes on.

"Ash, did you just hear that?!" She whispers as the nurse leaves the room and I manage to zone out while staring at her beauty.

"What? What was that baby, I missed it." I shuffle out of my chair and over to her bed.

"I'm being discharged tomorrow!" She grabs my shoulders as she kneels up on the bed so she's about the same height as me.

Joy fills my body as the words process in my brain.

My girl is healthy enough to go home. She's done so well and made so much improvement in such little time.