Then Where Is Home?

Chapter 35

TW for this chapter: Fighting about religion, past religious trauma, past abuse mention, past religious torture mention, past near death experience mention, past abusive relationship mention

"Welcome back, I didn't think you were gonna come back." Dr. Simon said.

"Is it that much of a surprise to see me?" Phil asked as he sat down in the chair opposite of him.

"It's not entirely a surprise when I see you, because I look at my appointment book, but it's a nice surprise to see your name there." Dr. Simon said lightly as he put a fresh piece of paper on his clipboard.

"So the shorter answer is, yes." Phil said with his eyebrows raised and Dr. Simon chuckled lightly.

"Yeah. How are you today?" He asked as he pulled a pen from off the desk.

"Fine, I think." Phil shrugged. Dr. Simon raised his eyebrows.

"You think? And normally when you think you're fine you don't come in for private sessions." Dr. Simon pointed out.

"Okay well I'm fine, but not entirely fine. Like I'm fine just less fine then I should be." Phil tried to explain.

"So the shorter answer is, you're not fine." Dr. Simon said with a slight smile on his face.

"Oh fuck off Simon." Phil said as he playfully rolled his eyes.

"Yknow I think all three of your kids have said the exact sentence to me before." Dr. Simon laughed.

"I would not be surprised." Phil chuckled.

"So what brings you in, what's on your mind?" Dr. Simon asked as to get the session on a more serious track.

"I dunno, things with the boys haven't been great. Tommy and Techno are constantly fighting about religion, Wilbur is having a gender crisis that I'm doing my best to try and support, and Storm is about to give birth any day now. I know she's not technically one of the boys but that's just another thing I'm stressing out about." Phil explained. Dr. Simon began to take notes at once.

"Well let's work our way through this. Tommy and Techno are fighting about religion, I know both their beliefs about religion and I know that Tommy is trying to figure things out surrounding that. I also know that you don't like to talk about religion with people because you would just rather stay out of it." Dr. Simon said. Phil half shrugged.

"It's not that I don't like to talk about religion, and it's not that I want to just stay out of it. I truly believe that as long as you aren't hurting yourself or others you can believe in whatever you would like to believe in. Techno is atheist and that's fine, Tommy wants to explore religion that's fine, but they're both strong in where they stand right now and it's causing conflict. I don't want Techno to be forced to be around religion because it's uncomfortable and triggering for him. At the same time I don't want Tommy to be forced away from religion or hurt by it because it's delicate for him too, he has religious trauma too. I'm just trying to take care of both of them but it's hard." Phil ranted.

"I get your point. I think a good route you could take here is just sit Tommy down and explain to him Techno's point of view. Tommy grew up in the foster system and he was hyperaware to abuse currently happening to those around him, but not as much the past abuse that he wasn't there for. It seems like sometimes he has a hard time processing others past trauma, and it isn't his fault in the slightest. It's just how it ended up." Dr. Simon suggested.

"I've tried, but he hasn't seemed to fully get it." Phil sighed.

"He might just need more time to try and grasp it. There isn't much you can do beyond trying to explain it to him. Have you given any thought to spending some time away? I know last time you were very hesitant." Dr. Simon asked.