Smuttier (Dabi X Yn)

Chapter 17

   I can honestly say I don't hate anyone, I never have. I guess that makes me a freak in this world. Even in betrayal the mechanism to turn it into hatred fails, instead my mind seeking to understand their behaviour from a compassionate point of view. Why did they do it? What is it about them that lead them to such a bad decision? I don't keep folks around that hurt me over and over, failing to learn even a little from each life lesson, it isn't a good idea. The greatest predictor of future behaviour is past behaviour. I just hope that in time hatred is seen for the pointless waste of time it is and that when we see it we begin to understand that it is a marker of love misused. I've never hated anyone well, anyone except him. Standing up rage fueling my fire as i search for a way to avenge his. I find him the man who killed my one and only, Endevour.  I run up to him and grab him i feel the burning sensation spreading across my body from touching him. Its all going to be worth it if its for my love i'll do it. The pain is peircing I fall of him screaming. As I lay there wondering why im not good enough, why I cant avenge him. I see him standing there telling me its okay, holding me and ccomforting me. Reminding me Im good enough, and just for a second the word feels complete and i feel safe but that safeness comes crashing down in the form of a killer and a god awful father. The hatred I feel for this sorry exscuse for a man if equivalent to drinking poison and expecting the OTHER person to die. Hate is a wasted emotion and it never solves anything. Except when its him. When its him I dont care if it solves nothing I would rather die fighting him then give into his selfish and egotistical ways.

Everybody was on that sacred ground, both attackers and defenders, each fighting for survival in a unique way. Time passed as it always does, neither quickening nor slowing down, until the designated moment when fighting would begin. Even while the poet might perceive good intentions in either battalion, the truth is that they are hell created by humans, filled with agony and screaming souls dying. Heroes and villains are both violent; the distinction is that heroes possess strong empathy, self-control, and logical thought processes. Conversely, I react rashly and dash straight into the flames.