fate | CL fanfic

eighteen

"But you trust me right Charles?"

When he doesn't answer, I freeze up, eyes widening and an all too common emotion bubbling in my stomach, a range of them at that. Anxiety, anger, sadness.

Charles didn't know why he didn't answer the question because of course, he trusted her, but he was still seeing red, mind racing with ideas and plans to fix this situation and all he could do was act on impulse, something that in the past had never failed him but there was a first time for everything and he was about to experience just how it felt to fuck up.

I fiddled with the band of the ring, "Do you love me?"

He meant to say yes because he did. He truly did love Evangeline like nothing else. She made him feel something. He was just too scared to call it love.

Instead, he did what he did best. Put up a facade, a hard face and covered his feelings with a layer of tar. "Maybe I should just take that ring back. It hasn't even been six hours and I'm regretting my fucking decision."

and maybe it was the way my eyes widened or the way I gasped that made him realise he crossed a line, "Wait- Eva-

The weight of his words hits him and he finds himself dropping your phone, the screen cracking in the process and he grimaces when he hears the thud. Eva had already turned around and the ring was placed gently on the office table, the weight of it suddenly too much.

I felt sick to my stomach.

"Seems I'm not the only one who can't be trusted," I sniffed "Thanks a lot Charles, just gonna go entertain your friends." He didn't even attempt to stop me, he'd really fucked it this time.

————
May 25th:

It was safe to say it took us a few days, well basically a week to get somewhat back to normal after Charles and I had our little 'situation.' We had hardly talked to eachother this week of my own accord. And I'd been sleeping back in my old room. Well I wouldn't call it sleeping, my insomnia is back and thriving so I've been kinda lying there contemplating my life decisions up until this point.

Last night we went back to sleeping in the same bed because he carried me up from the couch where I fell asleep, he placed a kiss on my forehead and waited until I woke up again to ask if I'd move back into his room.

I was too tired to say no.

Tonight Charles decided to cook dinner for Eva whilst she had been on the phone with the electricity bill people all day, she came into the kitchen at eight o clock with tired eyes and dark under eyes, "How was your day Mon Cheri?"

Charles asked his questions gently and softly, all he wanted was to be in her good books again, "Tiring." I simply said dropping the house phone on the table.

"I'm sorry Eva, why don't you go upstairs and get changed into something more comfortable, dinner will be ready soon." He said walking towards me and placing a kiss on my lips, I smiled weakly at him and nodded taking myself up the stairs.

Charles continued cooking the chicken Parmesan following a recipe given to him by susannah, he'd already summoned her multiple times to make sure he was doing everything correctly. He needed it to be perfect.

When I came downstairs in one of his T-shirts and a pair of boxer shorts Charles placed two plates on the table and smiling at me as I sat at the table, "This looks lovely Charles, you didn't have to." I blushed, picking up the wine glass.

"I wanted to, I wanted to show you how much I appreciate you." He smiled raising his glass to clink with mine as we drank our red wine.

"Don't say things like that because then I'll love you, and well i don't think that's fair if you don't love me.." I shared as I sipped generously on my red wine.

"Eva you know that's not true."

"Oh so you lie too?" I quizzed.

"I want to see you win. I want to see you absolutely smash every single dream you have. I want to see you overcome all of the barriers you face and I want to see you succeed. I'm your biggest fan, your top supporter and I'll be with you every step of the way as your husband and best friend. If that can all be defined by love," he paused "Then I'm pretty fucking certain that I love you mon Cheri and I'm really sorry."

What the hell do I say to that?

"Really?"

"Don't doubt it for another second Eva, I really do love you..." He admitted, which I knew was hard for him. He struggles with feelings and he's told me so before.

"I love you too, you absolute pain in the ass." I said sticking a piece of chicken in my mouth, looking up at him, meeting his eyes that were already looking at me. We smiled for a moment and a silence took us over, a thought repeating in his mind as he mulled over his food.

"I think you should apply to the Monaco art school." Charles said softly, a smile on his face, he knew this house was just tiring her out and she wasn't living her dream. "You've dreamt of being an artist for so long I don't want to keep you from doing that."

"I'd have to leave the house for that to happen you know."

"Yeah, you can go to the university on the other side of town, it's really high regarded and it's got a great art department." He explained, he's definitely researched this stuff.

"I don't know, it's not the same as it used to be-
I haven't been able to paint all this week and," I shrugged looking down at the plate of food.

"Fuck that, this is your dream Eva. The first day I met you all you were mentioning was art school. You need to grab it and make it come true. I'll be here every step of the way for you, okay?" He smiled at me reaching his hand across the table to take mine.

"Okay." I whispered, intertwining my hand with his, looking at the way his hand fit mine like they were made for each other.