Defamed: Book Three (bxb) ✔️

Chapter Twenty-Two: Yes

Cameron Windsor

"It's been two damn days, what do you want to do?" Carter sang as he entered my bedroom. "I mean," He glanced around. "It's not like you ever unpacked to stay here. It didn't feel like home to you." He looked at my defeated form, curled up in the middle of my bed. "But I happen to think that Asher's home would feel a lot like home."

"Why does he want to marry me? Have me move in? I can't even blame him and say he was only doing this because of my college issue, but he gave me that present a while before I found out my fees. He actually wants these things from me. Why?"

Carter sat down on the edge of my bed. "Because he loves you. Because he wants you to be happy. Because he wants to grow a future with you." He sighed dramatically. "You two have an epic love story, and by giving you only half of that gift shows he wasn't trying to pressure you. He told you it was a promise of the future. Your future with him involves being married like you were supposed to be by now. Living together like you were also supposed to be doing by now." He scooted closer to me. "You both still want those things, so what is holding you back?"

"I'm a lot to handle. I'm traumatized. I still have nightmares from time to time. I backtrack. I don't want him to deal with me like that."

"Stop being a shithead for five seconds and understand that helping a spouse through traumatic experiences is part of the job. For both people. Because life will still throw you curve balls. You're not unworthy to be married to him. To live with him. Take back what is yours, Cameron. Asher clearly wants to give it to you."

I pushed my face into my pillow. "Why is this so hard?!"

"It's not," Carter said. "Do you want to live with him?"

"Yes."

"Right, and do you want to marry him?"

"Of course I do! I have since we talked about it years ago!" I sat up and glared at my brother. "Stop it. I'm worried about him having to deal with me for potentially his entire life."

"That's the deal with marriage, Cameron." Carter was serious now. "Alastair doesn't look at me like someone with bipolar disorder who can lash out on accident. He doesn't see my eating disorder. He doesn't look at my mountains of trauma and see them as something not worth his trouble. Same with Ace and Cade's autism. You are still worthy to be loved by Asher, and he clearly wants to be loved by you enough to marry you. So, pack a fucking bag or two—won't take much—and I'll take you home. Home has always been where Asher is. You can still be independent in a relationship, and you know damn well that he will make sure you have what you need. As you will do the same for him. That's called love. Now pack a fucking bag."

Carter stared at me until I slowly moved off my bed. When I looked around, I realized the boxes were still packed from when I moved in. There were a few that were opened, but most remained the same. It just didn't feel like my space. It was temporary. But what Asher wanted to give me was permanent. I needed permanent. I wanted permanent with him—no matter how terrifying the thought was.

Being away from him while I thought through everything was killing my soul. We haven't so much as even called one another. Asher respected my boundaries and allowed me the space to figure things out for myself. And that was just another reason that I wanted all of this.

Eight years ago, we swore we'd live together. Get married. Adopt a cat. Or three. Go on adventures. Spend time with one another. We planned everything out that we wanted. Then it crashed and burned.

But it was no longer burning. The fire was put out. And even though James was still out of jail, I promised myself that my life wouldn't stop. I could enroll in college with a last name that actually meant something to me. Meant more than the world to me. I could become what we always wanted.