𝐃𝐞𝐯𝐨𝐮𝐫░𝐌𝐞 ˡᵘᵏᵃᵈʳⁱᵉⁿ . ✰° .ᐟ IN EDITING . ✰° .ᐟ

░4░ QUATRE【Lingering-Thoughts】

❀MARINETTE❀

ꕤ Thursday ꕤ

𝓐𝓕𝓣𝓔𝓡 my date with Cat Noir I can't help but stay up at night. To be honest, I really liked Luka, and more than anything I loved Adrien. When it comes to holding all these Kawamis in place, being the guardian is a lot. I felt like, I had to break up with Luka, but that doesn't mean I'm not—not okay with it.

I feel like, I was starting to feel comfortable with him, but seeing as things are . . . there was just, no way . . . that I could stay with him. It hurts to even think that I broke his heart, but it hurts more knowing I absolutely can't be with him. So I thought, maybe I'll give love another chance? Maybe I'll distract myself, after all, if things can't work in my civilian life, I could at least try to work with . . . Cat Noir and have boundaries with him.

Because at least . . . he could understand. Because he shared the same responsibilities as me. With the exception that I'm a guardian, at least no matter what, he's always there for me. But that is not to say that Luka wasn't either, I mean I really cared for him, and to be honest it feels like a chain reaction.

First, I set my eyes for Adrien, then get disappointed that things don't go well because I can't talk to him straight! (I've talked to him more in my fantasy than in real life.) So then, I think maybe I can make things work with Luka? He seemed to care about me a lot, and I could talk to him. But the truth is, I can't! Because anytime I wanted something normal, anytime I wanted us to work, my secret would get in the way!

However, here I am with Cat Noir, who apparently broke up with his lover, and since we're both having it rough, I feel like this could really work. Look I know what your thinking, "Ladybug—isn't it too quick to get back into a relationship?" and you know what? You're exactly right! But for me, with all these things about defeating Hawkmoth and protecting Kawamis, I just need . . . a little break.

I want love, and if I can't make it work with anyone else, what's there not to try with Cat Noir? Maybe I'm tired of being stubborn and serious, I just want . . . a little fun in my life.

So maybe, you're right, it is a little fast. I mean with everything that went down, of course I have feelings for Luka still. But, I want to forget about it—I want to forget that I failed him, and I want to restart. He deserves someone special, someone he can be real about with everything.

And me? I deserve to be able to stick with someone who gets me, who gets the truth that I can give, so no more running, I have to be true to Cat Noir. I'm going to stop letting his hopes drown, and I'm going to stop giving excuses to people I shouldn't be with.

But if anything, I think I'm off to a good start. As long as I keep things only between our masks and nothing about our personal lives, I think it'll work. I'll just . . . tell my friends that I have no interest in Adrien either. Phew, I hope things will go well at school, I mean it's not like . . . Luka goes there, but his sister sure does.

However, I'm sure she understands. I'm also sure, Luka will be okay, I mean I devilized him and he got the answers he wanted right? Besides, if I show everyone that I'm not interested in either of them, I could focus on my life with Cat Noir. Everything will be okay.

I slowly close my eyes and try to drift off to sleep, I better make sure I get a good rest for school.

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~Word Count: 673 words~