Anti-Hero || Leah Clearwater

4 - Older but never wiser

"I have this thing where I get older but just never wiser

Midnights become my afternoons"

Anti-Hero – Taylor Swift

Leah couldn't claim to have always made the right choices in her life.

Several times, she had let instinct guide her rather than reason. Lately, she had certainly preferred to follow her feelings... her anger.

Currently, her mind was divided into two parts: a more rational part, where the Leah she had always been continued to scrutinize everything critically and search for pitfalls in every single thing; on the other hand, there was the imprinting part, that urged her to erase any restraint or inhibition.

Felix told her to go with him to Italy and the wolf within her pushed her not to refuse. Because now, there was nothing rational left in her.

Despite the internal battle, her wolf instinct at that moment wasn't thinking about survival or what would happen once they were in front of the Volturi. No. It was thinking about how it was impossible to say no to him because what he had given her was an order, and the wolf inside her could only obey.

Imprinting made her weak. Her instincts were subdued, and the only thing that mattered was Felix. And what Felix wanted at the moment was to take her to Italy.

§

It wasn't the first time she had taken a plane in her life. The flight from Vancouver to Frankfurt was ten hours long and a whole day had already passed since she had left Forks. She needed to transform; the wolf inside her was itching to come out.

She didn't exactly know where Felix intended to take her. Leah was aware that the Volturi lived in Volterra, but she wasn't so sure that would be their final destination. While waiting for boarding, at the airport, Felix had spent almost half an hour on the phone, speaking in Italian. Leah didn't ask questions, too preoccupied with the uncertainty of her future at the moment.

During the car journey to Vancouver, she had time to think about why Felix wanted her with him in Italy and the only plausible explanation was that he truly intended to find a way to... undo the imprinting. 

A part of her was relieved because if he had wanted to kill her, he would have already done it in the middle of the Canadian forests. Despite Leah being the fastest in the pack, he was undoubtedly much stronger than her. Bringing her to Volterra to kill her didn't seem like a plausible explanation. So, in the end, she believed that he genuinely wanted to resolve the matter. Would he kill her afterward? Likely. Leah didn't even rule out the possibility of him killing her at some point, if they couldn't find a way to end the imprinting.

The other part of her was... sad. There was no other way to define what she felt. Leah had learned early in life that self-pity led nowhere. Not even unleashing her anger on others, but, on the other hand, she wasn't perfect. And partly, she enjoyed contradicting the others in the pack. The problem was that the wolf inside her, now accustomed to Felix's presence, felt rejected in such a profound way that it tore at her. Not only did her imprinting want nothing to do with her, but rather than being attracted to her, it preferred to invest time in finding a definitive solution to what he considered only a problem.

One of the flight attendants approached her to ask if she wanted something to drink, but Leah politely declined. Felix didn't even turn toward the woman; he stared out of the window, clearly displeased. Certainly, a ten-hour flight with a shape-shifter was not in his plans during that time, but she couldn't do anything about it.