Painful Struggles

Another Party..

Sel's POV

It's been a 2 months since El's party.. and honestly I'm starting to understand why people are telling me not be with Liam, he gets angry really quickly, he hasn't physically abused me or anything, but he has yelled at me heaps. I've been talking to Harry a lot more, after he told me what was going on and who Kendall really is..

*FLASHBACK*

I was going to work when Harry came and stopped me and he said that he needed to talk to me...

Harry: Sel, I promise this is important and I need to tell you!

Sel: Okay Harry!

Harry: Kendall broke up with me because she said she didn't want to be with a whipped dude who was totally in-love with someone else..

Sel: I don't care Harry! You cheated on me and you broke it off with me!

Harry: I wasn't finished yet... 2 months before you found out Kendall told me that he mum got remarried to Ariana's father, which meant that if I didn't so what she said she would pull your father out of jail. I knew that this wasn't  good idea.. but I couldn't tell anyone not even the boys and not even the police.. Kendall had some sim card installed on my phone and she was with me everywhere I went.. literally. That day when I came to ask you to look after Kendall, I went to the back home to the boys and we contacted the police... they found out and that night at the club for El's party, Kendall tried to blackmail me so they arrested her and put her in jail. I swear to you I never actually slept with the whole time I swear I only thought of you, I did this for you Sel... I never want your dad to come back into your life again! Sel I love you so much.. i would never do anything to purposely hurt you.. and you know that.

It took me a couple of minutes to take everything through..

Sel: Harry.. I know you love me.. even when I thought you were with her, I still thought that there was a part of you that was still for me. But now I'm with Liam.. and although everyone has said crap about him, I think he is a good guy and I'm still going to be with him until I think that it's time. You should know that I still love you and I always have, I never lost hope Harry. Every time I saw her with you, it would break me Harry, but it didn't give you any right to treat me like crap.. and I know Kendall put you up to stuff but you don't realise how it felt to see you with another woman and totally diss me.. It broke me Harry. And I think that for now we should just be friends, be there for each other. Harry this is going to take me some time. It's been 8 months and you've only told me this now.. 8 months of me having hope that you would come back to me, 8 months of crying myself to sleep.. some nights I wouldn't even get sleep, 8 months of looking at that razor and fighting so hard not to grab it and loose control.. and I'm not going to lie.. I did loose control a couple of times. 

I looked over at Harry, to see tears rolling down his cheeks.

Harry: Sel, you know I would do anything to turn back time and I promise you that I'm going to fix this.. but if Liam ever hurts you I want you to tell me straight away, okay?

I just nodded at him and walked into Starbucks to start my shift

*END OF FLASHBACK*

I was making the girls, boys (including Harry) and I some dinner, the girls were a little mad at Harry but everyone is all good and back to normal now, we were in the middle of watching mean girls when everyone started getting hungry.

Harry walked into the kitchen with my phone in his hand..

Harry: You got a message.

I take the phone from his hand and check who it's from.

Liam: Party tonight at 9.. pick you up in 20 minutes.. hurry up and don't make me wait outside x

I sigh out loudly.. and Harry looks at me weirdly..

I reply back to Liam accepting his invitation and check the time to see it's already 8:30 so he would be picking me up at 8:50!

I go into my bedroom and choose a simple dress, I quickly put it on and then Harry walks into the room.

Harry: Hey, where are you off to?

Sel: Liam just asked me if I wanted to go to a party with him.. so I accepted. Can you zip me?

Harry nods and I turn my back towards him. I feel his fingers linger on my back as he pushes the zip up. His cold fingers make contacts with my skin and I jump a little as he laughs at my reaction. 

I hear the horn of Liam's car.. meaning for me to hurry up and come to the car.

As I leave Harry grabs my wrist, pulling me close to him.

Harry: Stay safe tonight and if anything happens or you feel scared or uncomfortable, doesn't matter what time.. call me and I will pick you up straight away, yeah. Make sure as soon as you get there ask someone what the address is and text it to me, just in case something happens.

I nod and smile.. I give him a quick kiss on the cheek and hurry down to the car.

Liam: You're late!

Sel: I'm sorry.. I couldn't decide what to wear for you..

Liam: Hmm, well then I'm glad, cause you look hot tonight.

I shoot him a fake smile as we drive off to the party.

We get in and as soon as I could, I asked someone what the address of this place is, the girl gave it to me and I texted it straight to Harry. Within a minute he replied back.

Harry: Thanks love, keep safe.. call or text me if something happens.. I'm not going back to my place or sleeping until you're back home safe! xx

Sel: Thanks Harry! xx

*SKIP TO A FEW HOURS LATER*

It's now 1am and I really want to leave.. 

Sel: Liam, can we please go, I don't even know these people and I wanna go home.

Liam: Nup.. but I do have a surprise for you. Come upstairs with me and the boys.

I was just about to send Harry a text but Liam took the phone out of my hands and smashed it to the ground.. 

Liam's friends grabbed me and threw me onto the bed trying to take all my clothes off. They had a video camera with them and they were filming everything and laughing. Liam was kissing me and trying to take of my shirt. The others were taking of my pants and putting fingers where I didn't feel comfortable.. They were taking their own clothes off and this one boy even took of his boxers.. I got really scared and tried to cover myself, I couldn't even see because my eyes were so blurry from crying. I knew tonight I would be raped.. there is no saving me this time.