A Valley of Shattered Hearts

Chapter 22

Chapter song - Battle Cry by The Family Crest

I was at my lowest but I know I've been through worse. Truly hoping the week would improve, but waiting was a vigorous journey. I was positive I was going to run away this time, I kept on telling myself, 'just one more day,' but each day I held on for a little longer, I continued to lose myself.

I could feel it getting worse too. But somehow, I managed. We didn't talk much in the next few days, mostly because neither one of us knew what to say. I knew exactly what I wanted to say actually, but what I meant- well...there was no easy way to put it. I wanted an explanation, I think we both want one, but with my defense record...I had low hopes of ever sharing how I feel and it's always been like that so I wasn't an inch surprised when April walked up the creaking spiral stairs and knocked on my door. Well- it wasn't really mine, was it? Nothing is really mine.

I couldn't exactly say I was surprised either. It was something that was expected of her and I knew it would make her feel better as she ranted to me so I let her in.

"Come on in." I say, "You don't have to knock, you know."

She stood in the doorway, half wedged between the hallway and the room. "Ruby." She states, affirmingly.

"I would- there's something I do need to tell you so bear with me because I don't quite know how to put this lightly..."

"Put this lightly?" I ask and I can't help but scrunch my nose in the process. "There's nothing you can 'put lightly,' just...speak the truth, please."

"The thing is- I made a promise."

"Jordan Smallflower. You see- when he died, I was in a dark place. The lot of us were and needless to say, I didn't make the best choices."

"I went to a dark place, Ruby." April sighs, "So I know what it's like."

She then pauses before continuing, "Mentally. And physically. I got caught up with people who weren't good...for me. If you know anything about me or people in general, it's that the world can be an unkind place filled with unkind people," she pauses. "And as I said earlier, sometimes the path we choose is not the path that's right."

"Thank you for telling, but...I don't mean to sound forward, but how does this have to do with me?"

She nods, then takes a deep breath in, rushing the next words, "this-is-my-fault."

"All of it, Ruby. That's the thing- I owe too much to these-" she waves her hands around, searching for the right word, "powerful people."

I nodded, I didn't understand what she was trying to say but I could tell it was important to my story on some level at least.

"One of these people is President Grey."

"No offense, but that's kind of stating the obvious," I laugh a little.

I shrug her off, falling backwards onto the bed as I bury my face in my hands.

"I'll give you your time."

It was then when I knew I had to get out of here, anywhere but here. That's where I belonged, that's where I was destined to be.

That was my truth.

I packed my bag, quickly and happily. Throwing a mess of dirty clothes and books and whatever else I could find. I had a couple pounds, which was well enough to get me a meal and a place to stay for the night. I probably should have packed more but I could always come back and for now, I was desperate for a break.

I had been willing to understand, to start a new life, leave the past behind, but it was different now. That was before I didn't know the future. And the past needs to break free.