Noah's Winter

Chapter Twenty

     I woke up feeling like I was trying to breathe through one of those little red coffee straws; it felt like I was suffocating. I looked over and saw Jake. His light blonde hair was a mess and his brown eyes seemed vacant. He had dark circles under them and his skin looked like it hadn't seen the sun in months. For a second I began to panic, did he have cancer also? Could it be hereditary? I calmed myself down when I realize he looked like that because he was always in this damned hospital worrying about me. He must have heard my heart rate accelerate on the monitor because he was at my side in an instant. 

"What's wrong, are you in pain?" I momentarily thought about that; stretching my body I winced, it felt like I had been run over by five buses then was repeatedly beaten by a gang with baseball bats. Jake sat down next to my bed and grasped my hand. 

"Nothing I can't handle, big bro." I smiled weakly at him.

 "Jake, I love you. I want you to live a normal life. Go on dates again, get some sun."

 "No, not until you can also, Winter."

 "Well I'm dating someone, so it's your turn." I said lightly.

 He shook his head, "That's not what I mean, things will be normal again, once you're cured." 

I felt a lump rise in my throat and my voice came out in a low whisper, "I'm done, Jake. This is my end. I don't think I will live much longer." 

Tears welled up in his big eyes and he clenched his jaw tightly. "You will Winter. You are my baby sister, you can't die before me, I won't let you! You're going to get out of here and start swimming again. You will graduate high school with straight A's and be on the swim team in college. Marry a guy and raise kids, though that won't be any time soon, got it? And then watch their kids grow. You will die as a peaceful old woman." He was sobbing now and I couldn't help but cry too. I held out my arms and my big brother crawled into bed with me, hugging me tightly.

We lay there in silence for a long time, not talking, but it was a comfortable silence. We hadn't had any bonding time like this in a really long time and I had a bad feeling that it was close to one of our last. A small chuckle left my lips and Jake looked at me in questioning. 

"I was just remembering that time when I was around five and you told me that mom said it would be okay if you could cut my hair." 

He smiled down at me and nodded his head, remembering, "Oh yeah...you were not the smartest little kid. I gave you a dollar to take the blame. I can't believe you thought a dollar was worth saying you cut it!" He said, with a snicker. 

I rolled my eyes at my blonde haired brother. "Jake I knew it wasn't worth it. I just didn't want you to get in trouble so I took the dollar and my punishment graciously." His eyes widened and his jaw dropped. 

"You knew and didn't rat me out? Man...I feel bad now."

 I laughed, "I just let you think I was an ignorant little kid, Jake. Why do you think your pranks and all that never worked?"

 "I just thought I had bad luck..." We both burst out laughing, his sounding much more healthy and happy, while mine sounded raspy and forced. None the less; I was just happy to spend quality time with my brother.