Winter Love (Book Two)

16 | Returning Home

JESSE'S POV

A comfortable silence is shared between Sami and I, as we get closer and closer to that all too familiar trailer park, where my dad's home once was. Where my home will soon come to be. An old pop song plays on the radio - the volume on its lowest setting, allowing the tune to do its fair bit to fill the car with at least some sound besides the regular honks from other drivers on the road, a clear cut sign that this side of town had never lost its hustle and bustle.

It's just as busy as I remember.

But as the journey seems to come closer to an end as we near my dad's home, I can't help but feel a little bittersweet. As much as I want to relish at the prospect of finally escaping that hell cleverly disguised as a homely estate, I couldn't help the guilt at leaving my mother behind. As much as her decisions lately have been more than questionable, I still can't shake the fear that something terrible might happen in my absence.

I slow down as we approach the intersection leading to the road that would take us straight to our destination, hoping that I wouldn't come to regret my decision should anything bad happen to her.

"We're nearly there" I say, trying to distract myself from venturing in too deep the dark corners of my mind that would undeniably force me to imagine the worst possible scenarios.

"You haven't even told me...woah! What the hell!?" Sami exclaims as a man jumps in front of the car, waving frantically, and fortunately - I saw him just in time for me to be able to hit the brakes before I could run him over. My throat goes dry as my heart threatens to pound right out of my chest. This is as close as I've ever gotten to running someone over...but looking at the man, who now wears the largest grin, and as panicked as I am, I had to admit; I wouldn't have expected any other way for him to make himself known than to jump in front of a moving vehicle. Still as gutsy - crazy - as ever.

"Jerry!" he screams, waving excitedly as he makes his way to my window, "I could see you all the way down the road!"

The man hadn't changed very much from when I last saw him a couple of years ago. Well, that is excluding the fact that now he only had one front tooth - probably from using his teeth to open his beer bottles. His hair, although shielded by his fedora, had grown silver streaks, truly showing that the man had grown significantly, regardless that life had been lenient enough to let him retain some of his youthfulness on his face, despite his unhealthy ways of life.

"Miguel!" I smile, "does Rose know you're still jumping in front of cars?"

"You better not tell my wife!" he warns in his thick Mexican accent, regardless that he's spent over forty years North of the Mexican border. "She's missed you...Rose, that is" he adds curtly, staring ahead at the various trailers that littered the large property, certainly reminiscing about a memory he shared with my dad on this very land.

"I missed her too" I smile sadly, thinking about the tiny old lady Rose was that last time I saw her. Tiny, but feisty as hell, the only person that never shied away from sharing her two cents when it came to Jakob - which became the main reason why we'd lost contact with them over time - mom couldn't take the jabs thrown in her husband's direction by the old lady.

"It's been rough" he smiles grimly, "she had an accident at the market and hurt her leg, she's been working on her recovery."

"Is she okay, though?"

"Oh believe me, the old miss is fine. You know," he pushes himself closer to the car to whisper conspiratorially: "I think she got herself hurt just so she can use a cane like me" he smirks, but before I could respond - a light chuckle from beside me reminds me that I'm not alone in the car.

"Oh by the way, Miguel this is Sami, Sami this is my dad's old friend..."

"Are you calling me old Jerry?"

"Never" I say quickly, raising my hands innocently, "and it's not Jerry, it's Jesse."

"I'm pretty sure it's Jerry" he says without missing a beat, "and nice to meet you Sami."

"Nice to meet you too Sir..."

"Sir is my boss's name, but I'll take it because you didn't know" he says lightheartedly, proving that he's also just as witty as he's always been. "Anyways, I hope it'll make you happy to know that we've kept all of these rascals away from your father's trailer" he adds, pointing to some kids that were running at the nearby field, oblivious of any of real world issues. And it is in times like these, seeing these kids with their care free expressions, their only worry being outrunning their friends- that I wished I could turn back the hands of time and enjoy being a boy. Be a kid and not have to worry about protecting my mother from her demonic husband, or her cruel step-daughter.

"Speaking of" he voices, "Rose cleaned out the trailer when you and your mother didn't come over" he says bluntly, unaware of the fuse of guilt his words ignite deep in me. I'd neglected coming here because I thought I wasn't strong enough, but now I'm here to fix that.

"Thank you, I'm pretty sure he'd have appreciated that" I smile, "Miguel, I should head inside, I can't stop like this in the middle of the road."

"Oh, yeah!" he cackles roughly, moving away a bit, "before you go, your father bought another trailer before he...you know. I could ask one of the boys to connect the new one with the old one and make a giant home, that was his plan anyways" he sighs sombrely, unshed tears shining in his eyes as he stares off into the distance now, a true sign that the love he had for my father ran deeper than one could've imagined. He was like his son. The son he and Rose never had, but always wanted... "He really wanted you to move in with him."

My gaze falls on the kids once again, their eyes shining with innocence as light chuckles flow freely through the open field, as I begin to wonder how different my life would've been if my dad hadn't been involved in that accident.

Would I have made other friends beside Colby?

Would I have grown so distant to Rose and Miguel had he been around?

Would I have had a chance to grow up in a functional home, where my only concern would be which cartoon show I'd tune to when I came back from school, not play Russian roulette over which one of my mother's limbs would be bruised this time around...

"Obviously" he scratches his throat, "it'll cost you some money for me to get the trailer job done" the man suggests mischievously, and the laugh that erupts from my throat is one I couldn't control even if I tried. Clearly, the man hadn't changed one bit, he was still obsessed with money.

I reach into the cabby holder for my wallet, taking out a twenty dollar bill and handing it to him, his grin now wider than before as he finally steps away from the car.

"I'll see you around Miguel," I say, as I finally drive into the park, well aware that my father's trailer was at the very back.

"How do you know him?" Sami smiles, as he turns around to look at Miguel - who had taken a seat on a chair by the park's gates.

"He was my dad's landlord" I respond shortly, drawing in a deep breath as a deep wave of nostalgia washes over me the further down I drive. From the tiny mobile homes, to the old stripped vehicles scattered here and there, a scene that would creep most out...a smile etches itself onto my face for I am back home.