Winter Love (Book Two)

23 | Contemplating Forever

SAMI'S POV

***18+ content ahead. Proceed with caution***

I run my tongue over my lips, expecting to taste that distinct metallic taste of blood, but nothing. How are my lips not bleeding with how harshly I'm biting them? Trying my utmost to stifle the lewd sounds that threatened to spill from my throat, as his naked body lies on top of mine, while he's in me. His face buried in the crook of my neck. His arms clasped around me, my own joined around his neck, feeling the need to bring him even closer to me, despite the fact that there's no distance between us.

But in the heat of pure passion, deep frustrations bubbled from within me. His movements were purposefully slow, maintaining a rhythmic pattern to ensure his pleasure and my own, but not enough to send us over the edge. To send me over the edge.

I bite my lip again, suppressing yet another moan, refusing to allow a single sound from slipping past my lips. A constant reminder to be wary of one's surroundings. Especially after that dreaded recording.

"Jesse, please" I beg lightly, feeling absolutely desperate for a release.

"You give me what I want, I give you what you want" he says, planting a wet kiss on my neck, sending shivers down my spine.

"Bu-but I can't do that" I whisper.

"We're giving you your power back Babe, remember?" he looks at me, intently, his body glistening with sweat, the room extremely warm that I could totally understand why Felix and Beau had been doing this to keep themselves warm. "I love you" he adds, pressing his lips to mine, caressing my face as he goes back to his rhythmic pumps.

And inasmuch as I wished he'd do what I actually wanted him to do, I couldn't deny the fact that he was doing something to me that I've never felt. We've had sex before, multiple times. I've felt the intense pleasure that washes over your entire body, as the other's strokes get quicker, harsher, assaulting that sweet bundle of nerves in you; but this is unlike anything we've ever had before.

From the soft whispers, to the gentle touches, to the rhythmic roll of his hips as he buries himself in and out of me, just lightly grazing my prostate, forcing my toes to curl, my nails digging into his back at the realisation of what this is. He's making love to me. And at the thought, I let out the first unrestrained moan.

This is his own twisted way of giving me back the control, because at this point, this is the only aspect of my life I seem to have control over in months. Each touch, each caress, each whisper, each movement had a purpose. It was more than just a quick fuck for immediate satisfaction and pleasure, this was something else. Something intended to burn a memory into my mind that even in the depths of despair, or if the voice decides to make its unwelcome return, I would remember how he held me. How he touched me. How he kissed me, loved me; and another lewd moan slips past my lips as he buries himself to the hilt, my legs shaking lightly at the feeling of being so connected to him.

I try to steady my breath, as I hold onto him for dear life, but another stroke drives that air straight out of my body in what I can only describe as a cross between a moan and a scream. He kisses me right below my jaw, before latching onto that one spot like leach, certain it'd leave the biggest and brightest hickey, that would pop against my pale skin.

As soon as he's satisfied with eating away at my neck, he laces his fingers with mine, looking at me intently. And whichever thread that held my restraint back snaps. His intimate touches push me to moan out, without regard for my noise level: "I love you...I love you so much!"

And that seemingly does the trick, his eyes pulling me into that dangerous zone where it's just he and I in this world, nobody else. No problems, no more unwelcome thoughts, just Jesse and I. His next words assure me that he's in the same mental state as I am, succeeding in pushing me to my climax in the process: "I love you!" he says, his hold around me tightening as he presses a kiss on my lips.

The pleasurable feeling in my abdomen builds, I was nearing my release: "Babe, I'm gonna...mph!", I don't even get to finish my sentence before ropes of semen shoot out of me, painting my and Jesse's abdomens. And it was only a matter of moments before he reached his climax, releasing himself while still lodged in me.

But as soon as the dust settles, and this wave of pleasure I'd been riding slowly disappears, the reality of what just happened settles: "Oh shit" I struggle, trying to wiggle my way out of Jesse strong arms, "let me go Jesse, what if Felix and Beau heard?"

"Don't let that bother you babe..."

"Jesse!"

"Shh" he says, "it's just you and I right now. Right?"

"But what..."

"Sami" he says softly, string intently into my eyes, "it's you and me, right?"

Despite my desperate desire to get out of bed, rushing to the cabin next door, and explain to my best friends just what they might've heard. As much as I know my mind wouldn't be at ease if I didn't know if they'd heard...I still nod in understanding.

"Wanna cuddle?" a small smile breaks onto my face at his words. How can a man be so hot and cute at the same time?

Once again, I nod. He finally rolls off me, falling to the side. He pulls me closer to him, my head instinctively laying on his chest, the rhythmic beat of his heart helping in calming myself down.

"I just hope that things work out in the end" he says, running a hand through my hair.

I look up at him, a distant look in eyes and answer: "me too."

He plants a kiss on my forehead, "I really..." he pauses with a sigh, "...I really hope that we get to do this for...y'know?"

At his words, his heart picks up speed. And despite him throwing the question up in the air, I still caught what he'd intended to say. With that, I couldn't help but wonder: despite my insanity, he still wants to spend possibly forever with me?

"Why?" I ask in all seriousness.

"Because I love you, and I care about you, and I want to be there for you in every way possible. I can fuck up sometimes...well, not really sometimes, but I just want you to know that I always want to be here for you."

His rigid tone of voice tells me that there might be something more behind his words, but I decide against prying, choosing instead to enjoy this moment: "Well, I also hope we'll get to do this for...you know?"

His arms tighten around me, "Wouldn't want to have it any other way", he presses a kiss on my forehead, the last act I recall before the waves of sleep wash over me, pulling me into deep slumber.