Waiting for War

Kassie

What is the point in success? My whole life I have slaved away to be a good leader for this country. Katie's death would be justified. That I could get behind, but Terrence. Terrence didn't do anything wrong. He's not connected to anything wrong. What's worse is that Henry killed his father before him, but why? If only Henry wasn't there I'm sure Terrence would be alive, but what was he doing in that room? What did he think he could get out of watching Katie die? These rancid thoughts are what plague me day and night. I asked my mom about Terrence's death, about if what Henry did was right in her eyes. She of course decided to scold him, but told me he thought Terrence was there to prevent Katie's death. It was a necessity. But it didn't look like a necessity. He could have apprehended Terrence, he didn't have to kill him. But then of course my mother thinks he would have told everyone what was happening. And when Katie escaped it only got worse.

Katie hasn't said anything but the security has gone up significantly. There is an investigation into Terrence's disappearance, and since his crystal is shattered it is known that he is dead. With a couple of strings though, they've found nothing to go on. My mother has made sure of it. This only makes everything worse. This whole scenario worse. My mother knows that she's covering for a murderer. How far is she willing to go? How far is she willing to make me go? She tells me I'm a disappointment. That since Katie didn't die, next time she will have to be the one that executes the plan. I can't keep my head on straight. If my mom gets a hold of Katie is she the last one to die?

What's the point in being a ruler of a corrupt world, if I can't be proud of the future I built? Shouldn't I just be trying to work harder to defeat Katie, shouldn't I be putting in just as much effort to play fairly? But my mother says it's useless. Katie wasn't born playing fair. Her crystal is too powerful for that. This is to even out the playing field. There's nothing else that can be done. This is the only option. That's what she tells me, but why does she feel so wrong? Why does this whole situation feel so wrong? I love my mother, I trust my mother, so why does it feel like I shouldn't? Whatever it is, I need to know. What is the truth, and is my mom protecting it or protecting it from me?