Here Comes the Sun

03 |asteroids

I DON'T THINK THAT THERE was ever a time when I appreciated a week going by so quickly, and it's only Wednesday. Because spring break is coming in one week, there have been ongoing conversations about a party at Veronica's happening on a Friday night. Then again, it was all that everyone at school was talking about.

I've never been a fan of big house parties - not until now. But that wouldn't stop Laurie from jumping on my ass to come with her, mainly to be her wing-woman for when Brian Shepherd decides to show up. If I were to go, I'd have to keep myself away from the drinking for plenty of reasons.

For now, my parents are away at work, leaving me to have the house all to myself for the rest of the day. Bea is on my lap, waiting for me to rub or cradle her tummy. I swear she falls right to sleep when I hold her like a baby yet I'm pretty sure that her owners must've done this before they sent her to the animal shelter. Hearing her purs is the sweetest thing to hear as I run my fingers through her soft coat patch, causing her to close her feline eyes.

Meanwhile, I shifted my focus both to the TV and my embroidery - I needed to work on my cross-stitching anyway. Sometimes watching the needle pierce through the white fabric and trying not to get pricked by it does help me relax and is a great way to pass the time. This might as well be what I'm doing for spring break next week but I know that Laurie's persistent nature won't let me.

Suddenly, I nearly poke myself with the needle when the house phone lets out a shrilling ring from the kitchen wall. No doubt that Laurie must have some bullshit rehearsed, trying to get me to go to the party and to make an offer that I can't refuse. I'm way too relaxed on the couch and Bea is still curled up in my lap, practically asleep at this point so I hate to deal with a grumpy cat. The phone stops ringing for a couple of minutes but it goes right back to it and I force myself off the couch. Bea lets out a small meow before hopping off of me.

I mentally prepare myself to think of ways to let the girl down gently even though it hurts a part of me as I hike into the kitchen and grab the phone. "Listen, Laurie-"

"Imogene, I know what you're going to say but if you could just hear me out on this one, I'm sure you won't regret coming," she cuts me off.

I roll my eyes and thankfully she can not see how annoyed I am right now. "Like what? Like how I'm going to waste this opportunity to miss one party of the year or something like that?"

"This is not just one party of the year, Immy! This and the end-of-the-semester party is going to be a once-in-a-lifetime event. For the class of '83!" Laurie retorts.

"Yeah, but you should know why I can't go," I say through my teeth.

Laurie is silent after that and I hate to be the one to remind her but it's true. Do I want to go to Veronica's party? Of course, I do but not if it means that there's even a chance that that creep is going to be there and ruin the whole night for me. Once again, I'd have to watch my drink for the remainder of the time. I lean up against the wall, folding my arms as I wait for her response.

"I-I understand," Laurie said softly, "I just want you to be so cooped up in your house the whole week. You can't let him win,"

"I know," I quietly say, staring at the television screen for a moment and my finger raps on the side of the phone. I know that what she's saying is true.

"And besides, I get that this is too early but you might find someone. I don't want to push you out of your comfort zone and I understand if you don't want to focus on dating either," she explains, "You can't let this year be your worst and not make the most of it. Graduation is coming up soon, you know that, right?"

I almost laugh at her statement. "I'm fully aware."

"Just take the time to think, yeah?" she asks.

"I will," I sigh.

From there, Laurie goes on and on about her plans to make a move on Brian Shepherd throughout the rest of the call. I begin to make myself some TV dinner before tackling the embroidery again.

⋆˙⟡☾𖤓☽ ⟡˙⋆

Everything around me is dim-lit, nearly swallowing me whole. I can't move anything except look around, surveying the room's familiarity. From the ceiling to the floor, the place seems cluttered. I manage to move my finger but it barely budges and - wait a fucking minute!

"You look so beautiful when you're asleep," a sickening yet familiar voice speaks to me. It's low and still manages to send an uproar of chill down my spine. "I just want to take care good care of you."

Shit! His body is like an anchor as he sits above me, grinning from ear to ear as I thought he would be. He traces his finger from the side of my cheek to the tip of my chin before he starts to pepper my neck with kisses. I try my best to move but he has shifted all of his weight on top of me, it's unbearable. I want to scream if there's any chance that someone will be here to save me ... but that's not what happened that cruel night.

His hands were now at the bottom of my shirt, pulling it up to expose my breasts and I could see the hunger in his eyes as he licked his lips.

"And your nipples are hard now. You must be getting turned on from this, aren't you? I hope you don't mind if I take a nibble," he chuckles as he lowers his head and I wince in pain when I feel his teeth.

Get the fuck off of me! I want to scream at him. I want to punch him. Hell, I want to kick him in the dick. But I'm too helpless thanks to him. I try to wiggle but nothing seems to work. Suddenly, my breath quickens, and I can feel the tears prick in my eyes. His hands are all over my body, leaving those same red prints as if he owns me now.

My heart is beating faster out of my chest and I finally let out a scream except it's muffled. And within an instant, I wake up covered in beads of sweat and my hands are trembling. I look around my bedroom and then at Bea sleeping beside me. There's nothing but the symphony of crickets outside and the moonlight floods my room.

Once my breathing returns to its normal pace, I bury my face into my hands and groan. "I can't keep doing this," I say to myself.

These recurring nightmares will be the literal death of me. His face still haunts and whenever I hear his stupid fucking voice, all I can do is cry or wish that I can disappear. I don't know if going to this party will do anything for me. I don't even know how the hell I'm going to function if I were to just talk to one guy who doesn't look like my old roommate.

I try to close my eyes for a second, but a flash of the event comes to mind. I jolt at the thought, unwanted hot tears cloud my vision and sting my eyes. I place my hand over my chest, attempting to take three seconds of breath and relax while Bea starts to inch closer to me. As I run my fingers from the top of her head to her back, the softness of her fur manages to calm me down and my heartbeat also goes back to normal.

"Thank you, Bea," I whisper to her as I slowly lay back down. I wrap my arm around her to pull her even closer to me. Her purring vibrates against my body and I feel at peace once again.

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