Darkest Desires [Joel Miller]

23

Daisy

I helped Joel out of the car, guiding him to the house. The doctors suggested Joel to rest, take it easy but we all knew how he hated just sitting around the house. Since the doctors didn't let him drive home himself, Tommy gave him a ride. It seemed like their relationship was on the path to recovery and I was happy to see that. Joel and my dad on the other hand... It was complicated to say the least. Joel's relationship with Sarah was complicated as well but she still visited Joel every day at the hospital when I wasn't there. Joel was still her dad and she did everything she could to be there for him.

I reached out my hand for Joel to take it but he refused. "Daisy, I'm fine on my own."

"You sure?"I asked, giving him a worried look.

Joel gave me one of his rare smiles. "I'm sure, Daisy."

 When we entered the house, he sat down on the couch. Tommy put down his hospital bag and gave him a worried look as well.

"Can I do anything else for you? I can go grocery shopping."

"No, thanks, Tommy,"Joel said, shaking his head. "I just... need to rest for now," Even though he hated the situation he was in, not being able to do much, I could still hear from his voice how tired he was.

 He laid down on the couch and Sarah walked over to him, gently squeezing his hand. "I'm glad you're okay, dad. You really scared me."

"And I'm glad you're here, Sarah,"Joel said, smiling.

I stayed back with Tommy, smiling. Even though everything was uncertain at the moment, Sarah still loved her dad and did everything she could to make him feel better. Maybe they are going to be okay.

"One of us should stay with Joel. In case he might feel sick or anything happens,"Tommy suggested, looking at us.

Joel rolled his eyes. "It's truly not necessary."

"I would stay but I will be needed at the construction site,"Tommy explained.

Sarah sighed. "I wish I could stay too but I have this important assignment in college later. I have to be there for sure."

Tommy and Sarah looked at me, hoping I could stay with Joel. Luckily, I didn't have work today and I was basically free to stay with him. I just didn't know if this was a good idea. And I didn't know if he wanted me here.

"I'm basically free to stay here but... I don't know if Joel wants me here,"I said, giving him a nervous smile. 

"You can stay, Daisy,"Joel nodded. "I just don't think this is necessary."

"Yes, it is,"Tommy said with a firm tone. "Someone needs to be here to check on you."

"Fine, if this makes you make happy,"Joel answered, finally giving up.

 Tommy smiled. "I think we all feel more relieved knowing you have someone watching over you."

Tommy and Sarah stayed for a little while but eventually, they left us alone. I made my way to the kitchen, making us some tea. I knew we needed to talk but I didn't know if this was a good time. Joel needed to rest and I didn't want to bother him.

 "Here, your tea,"I put his tea cup down, giving him a nervous look.

I could sense he was nervous too. It's been a few weeks since we had any contact with each other. He gave me the space that I needed to figure everything out and I appreciated it. He didn't pressure me in any way or rushed me into making decisions. I truly appreciated Joel for that.

"You don't need to stay here, Daisy,"Joel said, breaking the silence between us.

"I want to. Besides, Tommy was right. I feel much better knowing you are not alone."

Joel took a sip of his tea, reaching for my hand. We both hesitated but eventually, I took his hand into mine. Everything that I felt towards him was still there. I didn't realize how much I missed him until now.

"You know... I was really freaked out when Tommy called me. He didn't explain much, just that you had an accident. I didn't know how serious it was and I rushed to the hospital as soon as I could."

"I was glad you were there,"Joel admitted, rubbing my hand with his thumb. "You have no idea how much I missed you. I didn't want to call you. I wanted to give you some time to figure everything out. I didn't want to put more pressure on you."

"I truly appreciate it, Joel."

"Did you... figure it out?"he asked quietly.

I squeezed his hand, not sure how to answer him. As Joel's gaze bore into mine, filled with a mixture of hope and apprehension, I felt a rush of conflicting emotions surge within me. The truth was, I hadn't fully figured things out yet. My heart missed him and what we had but my mind was plagued by doubt and uncertainty.

"I... I'm not sure,"I admitted, my voice barely above a whisper as I struggled to articulate my feelings. "I still have a lot to process, Joel. It's complicated."

Joel's expression softened, his thumb tracing gentle circles on the back of my hand as he absorbed my words. Despite the uncertainty looming between us, there was a sense of understanding and acceptance in his eyes.

"I'm sorry, Joel,"I murmured, my voice trembling with emotion. "For everything."

Joel shook his head, his gaze unwavering as he reached out to cup my cheek, his touch warm and comforting.

"There's nothing to apologize for, Daisy,"he said, his voice filled with sincerity. "We'll get through this together, I promise."

With Joel's words echoing in my heart, I leaned into his touch, finding solace in the warmth of his embrace. As we sat there together in the quiet understanding, I realized that I was ready to fight for us. Even if the world wanted to break us apart.