To Keep You

Twenty-Six: Chaya

Like fairy kisses, the soft yet thick snow-flecks fell softy on my skin as I buddled the thick red scarf around my neck and blew warm air into my enclosed palms. Winter had fully captured the farm and in doing so the wind turned from a crisp chill to a deadly icy frost. The ground that had previously housed leaves was now fully engulfed in several inches of snow.

"Oh, and that's stardust." Enoch's zealous voice broke through my thoughts and with a slow blink, I followed to where he was now pointing.

Across the pastor, stood an American Paint horse; it's chestnut and white coat shimmered in the winter sun, and I could not help but nod as it was beautiful.

Another week had passed in the blur of chores and strolls through the night. I wanted to say I had made progress in finding out who Ruth was, but I was as close to finding that out as a wolf is to seeing an alien. Malachi refused to even speak of her and in the small attempts I had to bring her up once more, he rebuked me, softly, yet still rebuked me. I wasn't blind, I saw the way his skin paled, and his eyes furrowed as if he was fighting some internal battle every time her name was brought up.

Not to mention his lover...

"Then that's Murder-roll, Joshua's horse." Enoch yet again pointed across the pastor towards a very tall and muscular, appaloosa. The horse, or rather 'Murder-Roll' as Enoch had called him, was mostly black, nearly as black as Joshua's hair. But on his backside, he had a splash of white with black speckles along with its face. It was a beastly and beath-taking horse.

Truly a monster disguised as an angel...

I slowly nodded; I was working in the horse pastor today with Enoch. Apparently, we were supposed to be doing a weekly headcount. But besides nodding and rarely smiling, I remained quiet and had stopped counting after ten horses. My mind was just too caught up in Malachi. 

He had a lover and that mere thought had kept me awake for more nights than I would ever admit. It had no right to bother me, yet it does. I have no intentions of ever loving again, yet alone my kidnapper.

"Then that's low-rider, Asher's horse."

Only a few feet away from us, a Lusitano horse grazed peacefully, seemingly unfazed by our presences. Its coat was a beautiful chestnut and despite its name, the horse was rather tall; beefy too.

I wanted so badly to drown myself in Enoch's words, to lose myself in his simple descriptions and not the storm trapped within my mind.

Who was Malachi's lover? I've been stuck here for nearly a month and the only other woman I've encountered was Esther. I've spent nearly all my time working either beside him or near him. The times we weren't together he always told me where he was going to be in case, I needed him. I knew better than to believe him, and therefore, he could have been lying to me. He had no reason to be honest with me and every reason to lie to me. Yet it hurt a part of me to even imagine him lying to me.

I silently cursed myself for feeling hurt, I had no right to feel hurt over a spineless man.

A gust of wind ripped around me and I shivered in the icy weather. I felt like a ghost, I wasn't dead yet, I'm not alive. I do not know if my soul belongs to the devil or to God. Or perhaps I was just a fallen soul that belongs to no one. I was a body without a heart and a soul, I was simply skin, bones, and a mind. Even my spine has grown weak.

Silence engulfed us as we strolled through the snowy pastor and it was only when we reached the other side and leaned against the fence to take a break that I dared to break the silence, "How old are you?"

His breath-taking hair and boyish features lead me to believe he was under sixteen but looks can be deceiving.

"Fourteen." His voice was squeaky and high-pitched, I would never tease a person for such a thing, but other children would.