Mending Heart's Affliction [Phoenix Countesses: ETHEREAL MAIDENS SERIES I]

Chapter 44

Clinging to his arm

"Usually, conditions like this take a few months to recover from, Celeste, but if you actively work on helping yourself speak and if you're truly willing, your recovery can be faster," my doctor explained to me that morning.

"Hindi mo ba sinusubukan? Don't you have a source of strength or a strong reason to regain your voice? Your daughter, something like that."

I shook my head and lowered my gaze.

Araw-araw naman akong tinutulungan ni Ariah. She always talks to me, but all I can manage are nods and gestures. The guilt that pierces my heart grows deeper with each passing day because I feel like she's suffering more because of my condition.

If it were up to me, I'd want to speak again immediately. Pakiramdam ko ay biglang tumigil ang mundo nang dahil lang sa nangyari at hindi ko na ito nagugustuhan.

I've been absent from work for weeks because of this. I've been unable to fulfill my responsibilities properly. Although I learned basic sign language, it still isn't enough. Hindi ko gusto. Hindi ako kuntento.

"Just let me know if there's any change in your condition, even a slight one. I'll be on my way now." She bid me farewell. I signed my thanks to her before she left.

I remained there for a few more minutes until Mom suddenly took a seat next to me. She looked more relaxed compared to the past few weeks because Dad has woken up. We're also relieved that the case against Victoria is progressing since Dad has given his statement to the police.

"How are you? Until when will you keep pitying yourself like this, Celeste?" Mom's questions made me look at her.

She sipped her coffee elegantly and narrowed her eyes at me.

"You're not the Celeste I molded in Spain. That's not what I taught you there. Mula nang mangyari yan sayo, since Arik rejected you again, it's like the Celeste we saw at the wine shop while eating leftovers and crying has come back. What happened to you?"

It's as if she hit the deepest wound in my heart, and it started bleeding profusely.

I quickly averted my gaze. I almost wished I could sink into my chair.

"M-mh..." I muttered, exhaling sharply.

What happened to me? I don't know either. I suddenly lost interest in everything. Samantalang noon, lagi akong nakahandang ipagtanggol at ipaglaban ang sarili ko sa sinumang aatake sa akin, ngunit ngayon ay tila bigla akong nawalan ng ipinaglalaban.

Maya-maya pa, naramdaman ko ang kamay ni mom sa kamay ko. I looked at her. She was gazing into the distance.

"Don't be like this, dear. I won't be able to handle it if you're the one we lose. Parang unti-unti mong pinapatay ang sarili mo nang dahil lang sa kanya, dahil lang sa nangyari. You have a child. Noon naman ay ayos lang sayo na kayong dalawa lang ng apo ko, hindi ba? Arik's condition isn't good either, but that doesn't mean your life should stop just for him..." She smiled and looked at me emotionally.

"Don't kill yourself for a love that we can give you abundantly and more. Your Dad is upset, too. He wants you to recover quickly to protect yourself, so please, help yourself, dear. The Gala Night is coming up, and Pau sent an invitation. You'll be attending."

My eyes widened at that. I wanted to decline immediately, but how could I?

I shook my head, but Mom looked at me sternly. She even glared at me. What?

"Huwag mong ikulong ang sarili mo rito sa mansion, Celeste. Who knows, that might be the key to getting your voice back, mingling in public again. I've already arranged for someone to accompany you on that night. I've even prepared the gown you'll be wearing. The only thing you need to do is to show yourself and be confident. I love you."