Not enough (Fermín López)

Chapter 16

Lorena had turned her phone off for good. She was so tired. So lost. So she ordered food after four days of barely eating and turned the TV on. There was a Turkish soap opera on one of the channels and she thought it could be good to distract her. The plot was insane but she could see why people found those shows so addictive. Still, she fell asleep halfway through it. Heartbreak was exhausting.

When she woke up, the next show was on. It was one where they talked about news in the first half of the show, followed by gossip talk in the second. Her mum liked watching it so that's why she knew about it. Lorena saw they were talking again about the singer who had a son with a woman who was much younger than him and now refused to recognise the poor baby as his son.

"Men really are all the same", she muttered, getting up to go to the bathroom.

While she was there, she could still hear the TV. They switched topics to football players who cheated...and to the one who hadn't. Lorena ran back to the room when she heard Fermín's name, ready to turn the TV off, and saw a woman called Sandra, who had been married to a football player for years, talking.

"We went through the same thing. All the cheating rumours. It was exhausting but we ignored it. But now I see this and it pisses me off. That girl is what? 18? 19?", Lorena realised Sandra was talking about her. "And we put her through all of this for nothing. Because her boyfriend is hugging his cousin in public and someone thought it would be funny to take a few photos to try to ruin someone's life. His cousin, guys! That's how crazy this is!"

"You really feel bad for her, don't you?", asked her someone else in the show.

"Look. I went on a TV show before I met my ex. I wanted to be famous. It doesn't excuse the way people treated me sometimes but I wanted the attention. She doesn't. They've apparently been dating for months and we only know her name because some people from their class couldn't miss the opportunity to talk about them on social media. And she's a kid. He's young but she's even younger. People are saying she even refuses to go to class after this. How messed up is that? She should be able to go to class without fearing being mocked for something that isn't even true. No wonder Fermín is so mad. I would have snapped sooner. I just hope he's looking after her like she needs him to".

"Hopefully now everyone knows the truth, she can go back to her normal life. And maybe not the moment to be superficial but...they make such a great couple too. Both so attractive".

The image on TV changed to the photo Gavi took of Fermín and Lorena after the match. And that was when she turned the TV off.

His cousin...the girl in the photos was Fermín's cousin. So he didn't cheat. Well, she knew he didn't cheat but he didn't even fake cheat.

Turning on her phone, Lorena went on social media and saw the video of Fermín confronting Adrián. That was where he had said who the girl was. And then, his cousin Lucía posted two photos of them on her social media. On one, they were little kids playing, and the other one must have been taken months ago. She captioned the post "me and my cousin, you psychos. Stop making shit up".

[Lorena]: I'm sorry I overreacted when you did nothing wrong.

She knew she couldn't tell him why she had overreacted. She knew she had to start keeping her distance. Because the school year was soon going to be over and she needed to protect her heart from future heartbreak. If Fermín wanted to speak to her again at all after how she treated him.

But he wanted to talk to her. Of course he did. When he saw her text, he almost dropped the phone. He was so nervous and knew he had to get his response to her right.

[Fermín]: you didn't overreact, Lorena. I get it. Are you coming back to class? Please, I need to see you. To see you're ok. I was really worried.

Lorena wanted to cry again after seeing that text. It was going to be so hard to control these feelings for him when he treated her so well. But she had to. To avoid more days like the last ones. To avoid being hurt again.

[Lorena]: I'll be there. Can we meet before class, though? I think we need to talk.

[Fermín]: I'll pick you up in the morning.

**

Both Lorena and Fermín were awake all night thinking about seeing each other again. But nothing prepared them for that moment. When Fermín saw Lorena walking towards his car, he sighed loudly. Relieved.

"Hi".

"You ok?"

"Yeah", she shrugged. "It's been a weird couple of days".

"You could say. I...I got something for you".

Lorena frowned when she saw Fermín pick up his bag and take something from it.

"I took notes for you. My handwriting is a mess so I typed it all on my laptop and printed them. They're not as good as yours but it's better than nothing".

"Thank you", said Lorena, picking up the stack of papers Fermín was offering.

She looked through the notes quickly and noticed he had also added some handwritten notes like she usually did. It made her feel so emotional again. "You didn't have to".

"Of course I did. You weren't going to class and it was my fault".

"You didn't do anything wrong. I should have listened to you when you tried to talk to me".

Fermín couldn't stand the distance between them anymore and leaned forward to hug Lorena. She hesitated, which broke his heart, but ended up wrapping her arms around him too.

"I want to protect you, not be the reason why you hurt".

"I know, Fermín. I know".

They stayed like that for a little longer, needing to feel close to each other again. Even if Lorena knew it was a bad idea. But she had missed him so much. And after the last couple of days, it felt so great to be held by Fermín.

"We should probably go. You wouldn't want to be late for class".

"Not after missing three whole days", she laughed. "But I got notes so it's ok".

Fermín smiled at her, not fully believing she was back by his side and drove them to class.

Everyone stared at them but just because Lorena was back. They knew the truth so seeing them holding hands again was normal. Adrián wasn't happy that they were still together but Fermín noticed his expression softening when he looked at Lorena. He worried about her too. Only thing they had in common.

It was all finally back to normal...but not really. To others, they still acted the same. But Fermín could notice Lorena was a bit distant. She was colder. He guessed she just didn't fully trust him anymore. And that hurt. He'd have to work hard to get her trust back before he told her how he felt. Because there was no turning back. Sooner or later, he was going to tell her.