Dusky Moonlight

23 (1)

Kayanangai stood by the mirror, looking at how beautiful she is with all these jewels that weight equal to half of her weight. Her delicate frame was all covered in a heavy red saree. Her face is dull, not having the enthusiasm for the wedding or at least for the new morning which she usually has every day. No matter how bad she feels inside she always wanted to start a day positively but today she felt the opposite.

The sky is rumbling the thunder and the dark grey clouds pouring out the rain like it’s never going to cease, no one expected it’s going to rain like this. They considered it as a blessing from the almighty. But Kayanangai wondered who’s blessed here; is it her or her sister?

It must be my sister. Kayanangai nodded sadly, thinking that.

As soon as she woke up in the middle of the night, in fact, she didn’t bat an eye in the whole night and kept staring at the ceiling, wondering if this her fate then what she has to do after this. To embrace a life which she never sought is painful, it gives her this fear and angst which isn't letting her calm.

She doesn’t know how to battle these feelings at this uncanny time of her life, no one taught her so. She’s put up in a place where she can’t see a way of escape; only she has to live and find out.

She took a silent prayer to give her strength to pass this day. Perhaps after this day, everything is going to be fine or at least after this marriage because she will come to the end of her acceptance battle.

On another side, she’s relieved that she’s getting a life that everyone wanted for her; she always wished to marry a gentle-noble-simple man who could give her a fair amount of love and children to pass her time. Now everything has changed without giving a warning.

Unable to mask her gloominess, she walked to the window gazing at the rain. It’s apparent that she’s not at all happy; in all levels of truth, this life is going to be hard for her. She’s a pushover and a mere toy to those who are around here. She turned sullener compared to when she has entered this palace and when she visited Aathiyan’s place.

The reason is people around here; they all seem to be friendly but they are not and the rumors about Aathiyan played a major part. Still, she didn’t identify the truth about her sister but she could understand she’s the reason for all this to happen and she can’t even get angry at her.

All this had changed her drastically and made her so miserable. Kayanangai left only with the option to accept her fate and live this ambiguous life no matter what.

She wondered whether Aathiyan is feeling the same way like she was imposed upon him? Her inexperience with the people and life couldn’t let her know what he must be thinking right now. He’s a complex person for her, his life is different, and he knows a lot more than her for his age. In all the ways, she isn’t the perfect bride for him. Even she feels this way but why doesn’t that bother him and willing to marry her?

She hasn’t met him after that day when Kumaran arrived and preferred to stay in her own little world because it’s peaceful. And she’s quite afraid of Aathiyan when she heard about the one incident when he cruelly punished the guard who didn’t do his work properly.

She herself asked a question if she does any mistake will he get angry on me too?

When she was in her thoughts, she heard her father’s voice. He was there wearing the best garment he has ever worn in his life.

Kayanangai stepped towards him with tears brimming out of her eyes. Her father is nothing but a safe place at this time.

Her father held her hand. “Kayanangai,” he smiled seeing how beautiful his daughter looks in the jewels he brought for her.