One of 10 - Nicole Lee Snsd

15.Goodbye

I'm on an escalator going up with the girls in front of me. Yoona is standing one step above me.
Behind me I see nothing but the empty, white floor of an airport.But there is someone standing at the bottom of the escalator. It's Jessica wearing her tour outfit with the bow headband on her head. She looks from side to side but not up.
"Jessica" I call her. She looks around unfaced.She didn't hear me?But she looks like she is looking for someone. She rubs her own arm like she's uncomfortable.
"Jessica!" I yell and wave for her to go on . She dosen't hear.
I get higher and higher. I realize we will leave without her. She has to hurry.
"Jessica!!" I yell.She can't hear me and she doesn't move but looks at a window. I get rolled up .She fades from view.
"Jessica!!! I scream devastaded.Jessica is gone! I wake up from the nightmare but the nightmare is still there.

So here comes the part many of you have been dying to read.

On 30th of September 2014 we got the news that Jessica was no longer going to be a member of Girl's Generation. She had not agreed to the terms of the renewal of her contract so SM entertainment just unrenewed her deal. Endless speculations has been circling for almost 10 years and I here would like to state officially and make it crystal clear: I nor my members of Girls Generation has ever,made SM Entertainment fire Jessica Jung.Simply put, its way above our pay-grade.

What hurt me the most is that her silence has hurt the rest of us a lot.
"Those bitches kicked her out" A fan wrote as a comment once. "All their crying on stage and at the airport are fake" Another one read.Lets go back shall we.When I saw her in the hallway for the first time Hyoyeon and Sooyoung had known her for 5 years. Here at this point they had known her for 14 years. Most members had known her longer than the staff at the company.We were like sisters.What person in their right mind would ever want to kick out their main vocal and sub center?SM's refusal to publicly defend us was the beginning of the end. The comments Taeyeon and I received from people saying we kicked her out cause we never liked her have always been hurtful.But a PR crisis team told us to be quiet to not add fuel to the fire.

We are leaving to do a fan meeting in China .Early morning are told Jessica is not coming.We ask for more information but our managers say they can't tell us anything. We put on our black outfits we always put on at our recent fan meetings.After we arrive and done with soundcheck we hear that she is never coming back. On Weibo she posted that she was told by SM and 9 others that she was no longer a member of Girls Generation. We didn't tell her anything.We had no contact with her whatsoever.We were told that she had a contract dispute and that they needed to have an emergency meeting with her on the 29th.If Jessica is not is not sure about the contract of course they can't send her to work.I had a feeling it was bad. And I knew she was called in like I was after filming the music video for "Gee". The other girls were sad but I wasn't, this was just a mistake right? When we arrived back in Korea I took Sooyoung,Sunny and Tiffany to meet with our CEO. Lee So-Man was not working at the moment because his wife who had been on her deathbed in cancer for a long time just passed away that week.

"Her lawyer that her new boyfriend got her said that she has to refuse to negotiate"
He told us.
"We have to halt all activities and get her back, this was just a misunderstanding right?"I ask. Tiffany and Sunny are quiet and look distantly at my face.Sooyoung stare at a wall.

"No, the decision is final,the board voted,shes out.She chose her boyfriend and the brand over Girls Generation."

I was quiet,I knew it was true.The last six months Jessica had shocked all of us with lack of enthusiasm for group activities but we just thought it was a faze.
She said to us she was thinking about leaving after our Japanese "Greatest hits".
In my mind I thought it was just a 6 month break.
People think she got kicked out for doing her fashion brand which was just glasses back then.Please. The real reason was that she was only going to do half of the live performances we had scheduled including missing out on Tokyo Dome. That was her wish.All members have missed out on performances here and there like Yoona and Sooyoung who often did tv dramas.
But what Jessica said she wanted was to appear in the music video for "Catch me if you can" (That we filmed months prior)But not do any music show promotions for the song. And again miss out on "Tokyo Dome". We were open to discussing with her the future.She felt like it was better for her to be an inactive member of the group like Kibum had been in Super Junior.Never ever what I wanted. So why didn't we talk to her the day before we took off to China? Or two days before?She was nowhere to be found. She was with Tyler and was unreachable.