Right Where You Left Me | Sebastian Sallow |

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN: Blood On My Hands

Sebastian's Perspective:

The rain pounded against my face as I slammed the door open and rushed outside to the bitter cold night. The sky raged above with dancing streaks of lightning and their following thunderous roar.

It was a torrential downpour; my boots were soggy from the puddles beneath my feet. My cloak instantly soaked, rain dripping onto my forehead from the tips of my hair. I needed to clear my thoughts, but it seemed as if the atmosphere directly matched my mind, almost mocking me.

I was alone, I headed out back and stopped right in front of Solomon's uncared for grave. The wilted flowers that were placed at his tombstone were washed away from the rain. The stone started to deteriorate, becoming forgotten just as Solomon has from this world.

By my own hand...

I'm sure if Anne was here, she would keep it tended, replacing the flowers every so often and cleaning the tombstone. Making sure his face would be remembered in this world.

But she's not

As I stared at the tombstone longer and longer, I could feel my body tense. I felt something warm ooze from my hand. I had no idea how hard I was clenching my hands, my nails digging into my own palms and causing them to bleed.

My poor Anne, still sick, still dying, because of him. Anne would be healthy if Solomon gave a damn about finding her a cure. Anne could be healthy if he didn't keep fighting me about finding a cure. Perhaps if Solomon wasn't so ridged and we worked together, I wouldn't be staring back at his grave right now. He failed both Anne and me. Now, he is six feet under from the cause of my hand.

Yet, I am still consumed with guilt. Dark magic consumed me during my fifth year, got the best of my anger and turned me into a different person.

That damn relic.

I always blamed Solomon for how Anne's and my own life has turned out, but guilt still clings to my side. Guilt is latched on to me as a leech, a pesticide, an illness. I am the one the casted the killing curse on Solomon. And for the curse to work, you had to mean it.

Eliza was there with me, trying to persuade me that the Relic was not the answer. It felt as if I was in a trance, letting my subconscious take control over my mind and body.

I can see it every time I close my eyes. Solomon knocked Eliza to the ground with a powerful blow of magic, leaving herself alone to all the approaching inferi. My feelings for Eliza were different during that time. He touched her. He hurt her. And my next action was reflected by my mind.

Tears now silently streamed down my face, combining with the raindrops scattered across my pale freckled cheeks.

I rush away from the grave, heading back behind the house and underneath my tree. It was in the middle of October, the cold air combined with the rain made temperature unbearable. This is exactly how Anne must feel asleep on her cot, all alone. Except for me, I have the luxury of escaping the cold. I now could care less about heading inside.

As I sat under the tree, I realized one of my biggest fears had come true.

The two people who I care most about in this world are now in the most danger they've ever faced in their life. And what am I to do about it?

My mind continued to race with more doubt and fear. Doubt in myself and the fear of being unsuccessful. Anne could end up dead, the thought of that makes me feel like the biggest failure in the world, a total zero of a brother. And Eliza? The care I have for Anne and Eliza is different. Yes, I love Anne because she is my sister, but Eliza? Totally different level. Yes, it's true I disappeared for more than a year, but that doesn't mean my feelings for her disappeared.