my best friends boyfriend

ferris wheel

"i guess i can scratch kiss on the top of a ferris wheel off my bucket list." he says trying to break the silence.

we get to the bottom and walk out. i feel like i'm making the right choice but why does it feel so wrong? "what rides do you want to go on?" he asks. "no parker! we're not hanging out."

"fine, get cotton candy with me?" he offers. there's just something about his confidence that attracts me. "fine but only if you're buying." i've been trying to fight my feelings for him all night. i have to get away from him.

i need to find mason, i text him asking where he was.

soph has me running all over, meet you later?

i laugh. while we're waiting in line, parker grabs my hand and we start walking away. "where are we going? what about the cotton candy?" i get dragged to the parking lot. are we leaving? he takes me to his sexy black mustang. "get in." he says going to the drivers seat.

"where are you going to take me?" i ask as he stands by the door. "away from everyone else." he looks at me dead in the eyes. "but i'm supposed to be away from you."

"you keep saying that but here you are still with me." i bite my lip, i don't know what to do. i could use being away. the cold breeze gives me chills but it feels so good. "i just want to talk about things, catch up. i haven't seen you in a while."

"you're not going to just talk, i know you."

"i'll be on my best behavior." he gets in the car. i look back at the fair. this will be quick, it's fine. i get in the car and put my seatbelt on. "don't go far and make it quick. i mean it parker."

he smiles and quickly tries to hide it. we pull out of the parking lot, he makes a right turn and drive straight. i didn't really know where we were going but i kept reminding him that i wanted to be no longer than five minutes away. i noticed us starting to go up a hill. he parked discreetly on the side of the road and got out of the car.

fuck why am i so nervous? i feel like i'm making a mistake. i get out and parker jumps on the hood of his car. i hesitate to do so. it reminded me of mason.

i sit next to him though and look at the moon.

"what is there to talk about?" i ask ready to get this over with. "i want to start over." he says. hmm. "i think this is a deja vu moment. you want to start over? again?" i wait to see if he's serious.

"i just hate how things are between us now. i want to fix everything and i don't want to lose you."

why is he saying all this now? he has the worst timing.

"what will starting over do? are we supposed to just pretend that we don't like each other?" i feel so tired, this was getting redundant.

i just want to continue life. i need to return to what was familiar.

"no but at least we'll have a clean slate."

he really wants this. i do too i think. so i agree.

"okay." i make him smile. we're quiet looking up at the sky. "can i kiss you one last time before i get to meet you?" parker whispers. i look at him again and get nervous. one last kiss.

i nod slowly and that smile appears again. he scoots closer, moves a strand of my hair out of my face then lifts my chin up to kiss me.

he kisses me slowly and passionately. this kiss isn't like any of the ones before. there's no urgency or lust, it's nice and perfect.

i bite my lip and pull away. we both sit after the kiss, i guess we're reflecting.

"hi, my name is parker. what's yours?" he holds his hand out.

this is so stupid but i go along with it. "my name is bri, it's nice to meet you parker."

❀

"oh my god bri! finally you're here!" natalie hugs me and almost knocks me over. "i've been here, just floating around." i explain as parker comes over to us and hands me a slushie.

"oh hey." riley walks up to us. please don't be awkward. please don't be awkward.

parker and i take a sip of our slushie in unison. "can we steal her from you?" riley asks. "you don't even have to ask." i walk over to my friends. "see you later." i wave to parker before running off with my best friends.

"were you hanging with him the whole time?" natalie asks. "i was with mason and his little sister then she ran off so he chased her and then parker found me." i tell the truth.

"well now you're hanging with us!" riley screams making us all scream like girls for some reason.

❀❀❀

i groan taking my shoes off. "i'm glad you went out tonight." my mom appears in my doorway and scares the shit out of me. "yeah well it's friday night." i continue to undress. "how did everything go? with the girls." she asks. "good. pretty good. i think we're going to be okay." 

"good. get some rest. you go to your dads early in the morning." she leaves. can't wait.

❀❀❀

"how have you been holding up?" my dad asks. "everything seems to be going back to normal. so that makes me happy." i show my dad pictures i took from the fair. "see, just keep your head up." he pats me on the back.

"so what are we doing today?" i ask. he always takes us places every weekend. it's something new every time. "go get dressed and you'll find out."

i sprint to the stairs and as i'm running upstairs, i pass noah. "noah! finally you're awake. let's talk." yay, i can't wait to listen to noah getting yelled at. i stay at the top of the stairs to eavesdrop but they both look at me then go outside.

i roll my eyes and go to my room. my room 2.0. my perfect room. "do i want to be marie or bri today?" i pose in front of my mirror. i walk to my closet and i throw on something random. "i'm ready." i walk like a model downstairs. "can she stay here?" noah groans and grabs the keys.

i scoff. "why is he grabbing the keys? i want to drive!" i charge at noah trying to grab the keys. he lifts them in the air so that i couldn't reach them. god i hate being shorter than noah. "none of you are driving." my dad snatches the keys and walks out the door.

i look at my brother. "wow you did your hair for once." i joke around and follow my dad. "natalie likes my hair messy." he sounds offended.