You Deserve it All

Chapter 6

MIDORIYA'S POV

I bounced Evan, patting her back. She's so tiny that it hurts my heart. I remember my daughters being nearly a year old. They were walking around and babbling. Sayuri was actually walking backward two weeks before her first birthday. Not just a few steps before falling, either. She would walk across the entire house backward.

"She was born at twenty-six weeks," Kacchan said, flipping through her medical history, which was as long as a novel. When you take that into consideration, she isn't too small. If she were born on her due date, she would be about seven to eight months. Her main doctor thinks she'll be fine with her size."

"Any other longer-term effects?" I asked. Other than her being deaf, we weren't told anything else.

"Not that they know of. Her scans are all normal." He set the papers on the desk before me and reached his arms out for Evan. "She needs a nap."

I frowned. "I know," I said, handing her over. "When are you going to Rachels?"

"That depends. Do you want to go with me?"

"Do you want me to?" He sighed and set Evan in the provided bassinet before turning to me. "Will it be easier for you if I go? Will it make you more comfortable?"

"Yes. But I don't want to force you to if you're not up for it." I'm not up for it. I could happily spend the rest of my life never seeing Rachel again, but I will go if Kacchan needs me to. The world doesn't just revolve around me and my issues. Plus, I do have a few things to get off my chest when it comes to Rachel.

"I'll go. Is it going to be alright if we take Evan?" Social services said we could use the daycare until our flight tomorrow night if need be. I don't know if taking her there is a good idea. If Rachel is going to be high, she could be out of it.

"We'll drop her off at daycare for a few hours," he said. "Let her nap for an hour, maybe an hour and a half, then we can head to Rachels and get whatever the boys want."

"What else do you need to do while you're here?" Other than clearing away custody and packing up some of the boys' stuff, I don't know if he said anything else.

"Nothing. I was thinking of changing our flight to tonight if I can. They may have a late-night one."

This is going to sound absolutely crazy, but I don't want to go home.

I hadn't left my house in a long time and didn't want to go back. Being here is easier because I'm not reminded of everything I don't have. Here, I get to look at what I do have.

I have Kacchan. I've always had him, and I know that I have, but I've been trying to ignore my feelings since he proposed, and I said no. It doesn't matter how many times I tell myself that I can't love him. I do. I love him so much that it physically hurts. I love him and all of his kids.

Before he proposed, we'd been talking about moving in with one another. The twins had just started calling me Dad, and Daizen wanted me to fly to America for his prom, homecoming game, and even join for parents day. I thought we had it all. I thought I was going to get that second chance. But as soon as he asked the question, I felt my world crumble, and I knew I wouldn't get it. Before I could say yes, everything fell apart.

"Deku?" Kacchan asked.

"Yeah," I said. "Sounds good."

"Are you alright?"

I shook my head. I don't have to lie to Kacchan. He loves me entirely, baggage and all. I never understood how lucky I was to have that. When he looks at me, I see it in his eyes. Through everything, he's the only person I've ever let in like this.