A Court of Watchful Shadows

Not now, not ever.

I get back to my room in the manor and am greeted by none other than Ziven, one of the worst people I know.

Any kernel of happiness I'd gathered from my swim was quickly snuffed out by just the sight of him, and the fact he'd broken into my room.

"Well well well." He smirked at me gesturing to the shivering doe in his lap.

I had been so focused on my hatred of his presence that I hadn't noticed. I froze.

"Nice little thing you've got here, it would be a shame if something were to happen to it.." he trailed off softly, though knowing him, his intentions were anything but soft.

"What do you want Ziven." I snap, wanting him out of my room and away from my doe, my last reminder of the love I used to feel all around, my last kernel of hope.

"You already know that." He drawls out bored, flicking at his nails.

"No, I already told you I won't marry you." I huff, he had to have been bluffing about hurting the doe, I wouldn't put it past my father to hurt an animal but could Ziven?

"And I'm not asking this time Ziláa." He was calm in his anger, he knows he cannot force me, not unless I agree to the marriage.

"And you can't make me Ziven," I state matter of factly.

"It would benefit both of us, we-"

"Benefit you maybe, you'd be guaranteed to take over the weaponry my father runs for the court, it wouldn't benefit me, I enjoy my freedom thank you, cauldron knows I'd been craving it during Amarantha." I quip back a glare decorating my face.

He always used this reasoning, the 'benefits' of it. Even the thought of marrying him makes my stomach turn, he comes from a family where the women are oppressed, similar to female Illyrians but worse. The women aren't allowed to leave the house without a chaperone, have to ask permission to do almost everything and have to follow a set of rules their husbands set them. Not a life for me.

"Wanting to run the weaponry after your father is called ambition Ziláa, maybe if you had some you'd agree to this marriage."

"Ambition?" I scoff "is that what you call it? It's greed that's what it is Ziven, you and I both know it." "I'm also not ambitious about living the rest of my life in chains" I retort

This angers him even more, he shoves the little doe aside and storms toward me, backing me into the wall of my bedroom, towering over me as we both glare at each other with hatred.

A different kind of hatred, but the same expression nonetheless.

He absolutely hated the fact I wasn't a prissy little thing, that would do as he said and marry him willing to bend over and be fucked whenever he wants and never go out of his sight.

I hated him for hating that. I hated him for his closeness to my awful father. I hated him for his inability to mind his own business. And I hated his overbearing personality.

"You shouldn't provoke me, if I wasn't so close with your father you'd face the consequences of your insolent behaviour." He growls in my face. Still oppressively towering over me.

I said everything I needed to say in my retort - which was to spit in his face.

He shouts out a swear, wiping it off and storms out of the room shouting about how one day I'll be on my knees begging for his hand in marriage. Yeah right.

I calm my thundering heart down for a second before running to go see if the doe Lucien gave me was okay.

The poor thing was shaking, we both were. I hadn't shown Ziven my fear, hadn't dared to, but it was quipping at my chest like a colony of wasps.

I fell asleep not long after casting some protective shadow wards around the room silently vowing no matter what the situation, even if Lucien asked, I'd never marry. Not now, not ever.