The Veil of Desire

CHAPTER 18

Yoshio's Point of View

As I sat at the dinner table, watching my wife set the plates and utensils down, I can feel the tension brewing inside of me. I know she's trying to make conversation, but I can't seem to bring myself to respond. It's not that I'm sulking, but the anger had taken over my heart. How many times does she have to do this to me? She knows how much it bothers me when she suddenly switches moods like this. One moment she's sweet and loving, the next she's distant and cold. Is she crazy? How can someone be so unpredictable and expect their partner to just accept it?

“Hindi mo pa rin ako kikibuin?” Patuloy pa rin ako sa pagkain ko ng padabog niyang binitawan ang kutsara at tinidor dahilan para mapatingin ang dalawa naming anak. “Don't make a scene, Yome. Nasa harap tayo ng hapagkainan at lalo na nasa harap tayo ng anak natin.” Nakayukom ang kamao ko, plinipilit kong huwag siyang masigawan.

“Don't make a scene? Seriously? Dō shita no!" (What’s your problem?) Tumayo siya at nagsimula ng mag iyakan ang mga anak namin. “Manang? Pakidala muna ang mga bata sa kanilang kwarto. Dalahin mo na rin ang pagkain nila. Mag uusap lang kami.” Utos ko sa aming katulong na si Manang Cara.

Iniakyat niya na ang mga bata at saka ko hinarap si Yome.

“Problema ko? Ikaw.” Matipid kong tugon sa kanya. Kitang kita ko kung papaano mamuo ang luha sa mga mata niya.

“Ako? Wala akong ginagawa sa’yo!” Bulyaw niya sa akin. Napailing na lang ako dahil sa walang kwentang rason niya sa akin. “See? Sa sobrang walang pakialam mo sa ‘kin at sa anak natin hindi mo nakikitang may pagbabago sa ugali at pakikitungo mo sa ‘min!” Sigaw ko pabalik sa kanya.

“Sana naman kasi intindihin mo ako! This is for our future, Yoshio. You know that I'm running for the higher position. Kailangan kong mag pa-impress sa boss and to comply everything they needed… sa company,” paliwanag niya.

“And do you think our future will be fine because of that nonsense reason of yours? Rason ba ang maging busy para hindi pakainin ang anak natin at pabayaang madungis ang mga bata? Parehas lang tayong pagod but do you think it is reasonable enough for me to accept that?” Suhestiyon ko sa kanya. “Kung estudyante kita bagsak ka na.” dagdag ko.

So, I stood up and grabbed some liquor from the fridge. It seemed like such a trivial reason for her to storm off like that. I couldn't help but wonder if there was more to it than just a simple argument.

As I stood on the terrace, the cool night air brushing against my skin, I couldn't help but think about what just happened. She ran away from me, in the middle of our argument.

Was it because of the stress she was under at work? She had been working tirelessly, trying to climb the corporate ladder and reach a higher position in the company.

My mind was flooded with questions and doubts, which made me feel anxious and uneasy. I took another sip of my drink, hoping it would calm my racing thoughts.

Just then, I remembered hugging Nalu earlier that day. And at that moment, I felt a strange flutter in my stomach. It was a feeling I couldn't quite explain, but it made me suddenly smile for no reason. As I gazed out at the city skyline, I couldn't help but wonder if maybe my relationship with my wife wasn't as strong as I thought it was. And maybe, Nalu could be the one to fill those cracks and make me feel whole again. But for now, all I could do was continue to think and try to make sense of my jumbled emotions.