"Absolutely Not."

Chapter 34: Kelsey

(Jan 3)

SIMON'S POV

Returning right on time, I would make it before her birthday ended. I'd have maybe an hour, two if I was lucky, to hopefully end her day on a good note.

It was the least I could do with our circumstances.

Maybe next year I'd be able to make up for it with better plans.

For both New Year's and her birthday as now I'd missed both.

And I also had last year's to compensate for, too, but how was I to do something that equaled to two years worth of celebrating? Surely I could think of some sort of activity outside the base walls. Even if it was for a few hours.

For fucks sake, I was no romantic. I didn't know what the hell I was doing.

Her present burned a hole in my vest pocket, a quickly bought gift from a modest shop as we were returning to base. It wouldn't come close to balance out that time lost.

Johnny had impulsively gotten each of his sisters a scarf as they wouldn't stop pestering him for a gift.

They said it was to ensure he was still alive by sending from a mission.

He and I knew they just wanted an item to brag about.

"I can 'ear 'em from here, Simon," he said, and then his voice changed to a more high-pitched one to mimic one of them, "Aye, Mabel, did you see my new scarf? All the way from Canada."

"Mabel?" I repeated, raising a brow even though he couldn't see it through the skull mask.

He shrugged. "I think one of their friends is named Mabel, ah dinnae ken." I hoped he saw me roll his eyes him, but he didn't comment on that. Instead, he directed the conversation toward me. "I saw ye bought somethin', too."

"Hm," I grunted, the light object tucked away now feeling incredibly heavy, heavier than all of my gear. I felt silly now after purchasing impulsively.

"Whatcha get?"

"Somethin'."

"Descriptive," the Scot bantered. We stepped off the helicopter, the second aircraft of the day, and I had never been more relieved to step on dry land before as my ass had long gone numb. "Yer not gonna tell me, are ye?"

''Nope."

"A blether today, I see."

"Sometimes I wonder if you're even speakin' a real language."

He laughed and gave me a couple of hard pats on my back which earned a grin he couldn't even see anyway. "I think that's enough to tell me it's for yer lass, aye?"

A shake of my head mixed with a roll of my eyes told him everything he needed to know. He knew better than anyone about me and Kelsey as he was the only one who knew everything.

"Anyway, I'm gonna take a kip," a lie, I was going to set off to find Kels right after showering; I just wanted to change the subject, "If you need me, don't."

"Yer bum's oot the windae, but go on then. Get yer beauty rest, LT."

It was probably because I'd returned during the usual time she trained, but it felt unusual to have my room so... empty.

Gods, my sanity had long left if all I thought about was her, wasn't it?

With a sigh, I stripped my head of the confining balaclava and rubbed some of the tension out of my face, simultaneously scratching where the annoying fabric had chafed against my now stubbly jawline.