I Only Wanted You

Chapter Nineteen- The End Of Us

There was nothing else to do but cry. I couldn't do anything in a hospital, broken. Sam and Jess went to go see Braxton but they would only let family in, considering he was in the ICU.

They brought me supper later that day and I ate very little.

"Alex, I know that hearing about him in that state is very hard, but you have to keep yourself healthy. You need to eat, honey." My dad said and I looked at him, "I'm not hungry."

"Alex, listen, you need to keep yourself healthy. If you don't keep yourself healthy there can be some problems." He said sternly to which I glared at him, "I'm. Not. Hungry." I replied harshly.

He sighed and walked out and Sam, Jess, and Ethan walked over.

"Alex, your dad is right, you know? Braxton is on all of our minds but we can't grieve and not eat. We all need to keep ourselves healthy, not just you. So, how about I bring some food back for all of us, and we'll eat together." Sam said and I sighed, "Okay, I guess." Then everyone had a smile on their face and Sam went to go get food.

She brought us back some Wendy's and we all ate together. I actually ate all of my food and enjoyed it.

My dad didn't come back for a few hours and when he came back, I asked him where he went and he said he went out to eat and then he just went riding around Florida, looking at the different scenery.

A little while later I fell asleep, no news about Braxton since earlier that day.

••••••••

The next two weeks were pure hell. I was still recovering from my ribs and Braxton was now on life support. We had heard that the driver that hit us, was drunk. We're pressing charges, fuck the guy who hit us, he hurt me and might take Braxton's life.

A little later on Wednesday, Karen came to see me.

"Hey Alex." She said as she walked in. I smiled and said, "Hey, how are you?"

"A bit depressed but I have been since all of this happened. How about you?"

"Pretty much the same. My ribs still hurt but, they'll get better over time. How... Uhm... How's Braxton?" I asked and she had a glum look, "It doesn't look good. It really doesn't. But, we'll keep praying and hoping for the best, honey."

"You're like a mom to me. I never really had one and I think you've been more of a mom to me than my actual mom has." I said and she smiled, "I'm glad. I love you."

"I love you too, Karen." And I smiled again and she did the same. We talked for the rest of the evening and about 9:00 pm, the doctors rushed in and urged Karen to come outside and talk to them.

I wish I could've heard what they were talking about but when Karen came back in with Sam, Jess, Ethan, and my dad, all of them teary eyed, I knew what was wrong.

I immediately bursted into tears and they all came and wrapped me into big hugs. Karen looked at me and muttered, "I'm so sorry." And I shook my head no, "Its not your fault. You didn't do this, that drunk driver did and he took Braxton from us."

Karen went out of the room and we all stayed back, except my dad, and hugged and cried and reminisced about all of the memories we had with Braxton. It was all too much, I really couldn't get him back this time. Although the crying was hurting my ribs, I couldn't stop crying. I wanted to but it felt like there was a river flowing from my eyes and it wouldn't stop flowing.

I never went to sleep that night because every time I closed my eyes, I'd see his face. I'd see the accident. I'd see the car ramming into us, I'd see us swinging on the swing set, I'd see us laying together. I'd see all of our memories. It hurt. It hurt worse than anything I've ever been through. Including the surgeries, my mom not being there, breaking my ankle, breaking my ribs, breaking up with Braxton, it hurt worse than all of that.

Knowing that the person you love, is gone, dead, and you can't get them back, hurts worse than anything. In that moment, and to this day, I still wish it was me that was gone, not him. I wish he could still be on this Earth, creating more havoc and just being him.

Because now, all I do is cry. All I do is wish he was here. And still, every time I close my eyes, I see him. I've been going to therapy for 10 years and I'm still not better. Not to mention, later on that same year, my dad died of a massive heart attack. The two people that love me the most were gone.

Sam, Jess and I, all live in the same apartment building, in Florida. Sam is single and Jess and Charlie are married and have a kid. But me? I'm still here, sulking in the death of my one and only love. I don't think I'll ever love again.

Sometimes, when I actually sleep, he's in my dreams. We do everything all over again, except, we never went to the beach that day, we stayed home. I wish we would've stayed home instead of going to the beach.

I go to his gravesite a lot, and each time, before I leave, I whisper, "I only wanted you... I love you." Then I walk away.

Who said every love story has a happy ending? Mine doesn't.

GUYS, THIS IS THE END!!! I AM SO PLEASED WITH IT! ALTHOUGH I CRIED THE ENTIRE TIME WRITING IT! I'M GONNA MISS THIS STORY AND I'M GONNA MISS YOU GUYS SO MUCH!

I WANT TO THANK ALL OF YOU, YOU GUYS ARE WHAT KEPT ME GOING AND I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH IT PHYSICALLY HURTS! CX BUT SERIOUSLY, I DO LOVE YOU GUYS AND I REALLY DO APPRECIATE YOU GUYS READING THIS STORY AND GETTING IT TO SO MANY READS AND I'M SO HAPPY AND JUST DKSBALSBDLSHDNSKAVAKSJDBEW I HOPE YOU UNDERSTOOD THAT HAHA XDDD

I ALSO HAVE A SONG THAT I DEDICATE TO THIS STORY! ITS CALLED "THE ONLY REASON" BY 5 SECONDS OF SUMMER! IF YOU WANT, YOU CAN READ THIS LAST CHAPTER OVER WHILE PLAYING THAT SONG! I DID AND NOW I GOT THE FEELS!

UHM. I LOVE YOU ALL AND THANKS FOR READING, VOTING AND COMMENTING, BYE YOU GUYS, IMMA GO CRY ;-;