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જ The Scars You Healed જ ☾Aca☽

Reviewer: AcapriccioRhythm

Client: Optaemus_Prime
Book Title: The Scars You Healed

Title: 7.5/10
The title is something quite common, words like scars and healed are almost always something you would see in a romantic novel or their equivalent. However, the title does do the job of drawing people in, and piquing their curiosity. However, while I was reading the book, I didn't find the title. It took me a while before I saw what it meant. In the first few chapters, it felt like the title was meant to be ironic, since the main characters were causing the other pain. Nonetheless, I still stand by my word that the title is pretty good and does its job well.

Cover:4.5/10
After reading the first few chapters, the vibe I got was very different from what is being conveyed by the cover. The author admits that the book is dark, with a rating of mature for its theme. So it puzzled me as to why the cover chosen felt like what one would see on a romance Fanfiction between a star and his non-showbiz love interest. The title also blends with the photo's color, which makes it harder to see from a distance. I wish the cover reflected the atmosphere of the story more.

Blurb:2.5/5
The blurb was just a single quote with no explanation. I wish you wrote something brief after the quote so readers knew what the story would be about, and thus know, somewhat, what to expect. It's important to note that the blurb is the second thing someone sees after the title/cover. And if the blurb is bare, many will not give it a chance. Personally, I wouldn't have given this book a chance as a reader due to the lack of a blurb, which is a solid foundation to a good story. Many great books have been ignored due to either a lack of a proper blurb, or a badly written one. I hope you take my advice and add a little bit more to your blurb.

Grammar/Vocabulary/Technicalities:13/25
I love the diverse vocabulary used by the author throughout the story. It really shows me that the author has a very good grasp of the language. It also shows me that the author knows how to use words as descriptions. However, I find that the author does not know how to execute this skill. While I can see that they have a wide vocabulary, it is not being put to use properly. A lot of the time, the author fails to describe a scene more vividly. There's also the grammatical mistakes littered throughout that add to the scenes disjointed mess.

My suggestion would be for the author to take the time to edit her work, and polish her story. There's quite a few things to fix, as well as things to improve upon. One such thing would be to fix the transitioning of the scenes as these very much impact the overall flow. Also, try to add in more thoughts of the characters. Don't just tell us or describe to us what they're thinking but actually let them say what they think. Just because it is in third person does not mean the characters should be puppets. 
Overall, the story has very good potential, it just needs a few tweaks to make it polished.

Plot Execution:6.5/15
The execution of the plot was all over the place. Firstly, the point of views were confusing. I understand it was written in the third person, but the way the switches were made between the characters gave me quite the whiplash! Secondly, The flow of the story was messy. There was no proper introduction of the characters, and so I was left confused as to who was saying what, and who was this person to who.  Add in the side commentary from the author, and you made me a jumbled mess.

My main suggestion would be to fix the scenes and ensure that the point of views, even in third person, are aligned with the character properly. Transition phrases should be considered as well. And, of course, proper introduction of the characters as well. You should also add descriptions on what the characters see, feel, what the environment is like, and how it might impact them and how they would react.

Characters:5/10
As I was reading the story, I noticed that the characters lacked depth to them. It was almost like they were one-dimensional, with only one specific personality set given to them. There wasn't anything about the characters that made me want to root for them, or even want to root for them. Furthermore, there wasn't even any character development. It felt instead like the characters were getting worse, somehow. I also noticed that there was a lack of proper introduction of characters in the scene, and the focus was solely on both the main characters. More descriptions about the characters, and how they feel, as well as their environment would greatly help.

Creativity/Originality:4.5/10
I have to admit that I doubted the creativity of the author's work due to them admitting that the plot idea and storyline is not theirs, they simply "translated" it and made it their own. It felt a bit weird to create a Fanfiction out of another Fanfiction, especially with the way the note was worded. The author also said that the plot wasn't theirs, which made me worried if it was plagiarized. While I do think that the premise of the plot is interesting, the important note had me hesitant.

Genre Relevance:3/5
I don't think the story fits the romance theme, maybe dark romance, with the scenes that are shown. It feels more like a version of Haunting Adeline, with JK's possessiveness towards the female lead. As for the mystery aspect, we do get that a bit with the person who tortured the female lead. But with the female lead's sole personality being her trauma and the traumatic event, it gets boring over time. It makes me not want to find out who did the horrible things to her anymore, which is unfortunate because I think that it is one of the things that made it interesting.

Reading Enjoyment:4.5/10
I didn't enjoy the story as much as I had hoped. There were quite a few things that I didn't think made sense, and the characters also felt very flat, like there was nothing to root for. Don't get me wrong, the portrayal of her trauma was done really well, it's just how the other characters interacted with her despite knowing so that really put me off.

Overall thoughts and suggestions:51/100
I think that the author has a lot of editing to do. The story has a lot of potential, but there are a few things that the author needs to change and improve upon. I think the portrayal of the female lead's trauma response was done well, but I want to see more of her other personality coming out in spite of this. I want to see more character development and their thoughts being shown instead of being narrated.