The Torture Of Being In Love [Dohwan/Hwanyoung)

Chapter 14: I'm so lost...

(TW: Self-harm mentions the chapter is rather sad, so listen to sad music to get in the ambience) 

Doyoung was swaying on the dance floor. He was hot. Junkyu's hands were on his hips, and Doyoung rubbed against them.

With his eyes closed, he let himself go to the music, letting Junkyu's hands roam over his body. He shivered when one of his hands came to rest on the back of his neck.

Doyoung looked into Junkyu's eyes as the music grew louder and louder. Or so it seemed. He felt like he was suffocating with Junkyu's hand around his neck.

Doyoung: "Hyung... what are you doing?" he breathed.

Junkyu smiled and replied: "Tell me if you don't want to and if you do... just... let yourself go".

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Outside

Junghwan had just finished his cigarette and crushed it in his ashtray before throwing it in the bin. The sadness had partly passed. The music had brought him back to order, and now he wanted to dance, to get even more drunk.

And so he did. Shot after shot. Finding it hard to walk, he had to lean against the wall, staggering.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jeongwoo: "Er... excuse me for interrupting this... thing between you two, but Junghwan isn't feeling well."

Hearing Jeongwoo speak, Doyoung turned his head towards him. Junkyu's hands dropped as if ashamed.

Junkyu: "Oh no, what's wrong with him?" he said worriedly.

Jeongwoo shrugged and added: "I suppose he's had too much to drink?"

Doyoung, surprised by the answer, replied: "Shit, I'll go and see him" and left in the direction of the toilets.

When Doyoung was far enough, Jeongwoo returned to Junkyu, giving him a look full of innuendo.

Jeongwoo: "You're fucking kidding me, aren't you?" he exclaimed out vulgarly, not taking into account that it was his Hyung in front of him.

Junkyu rolled his eyes, frustrated by the youngest's behaviour: "It's none of your business; besides, it's just a party. Let's have some fun..."

Jeongwoo began to lose patience and frowned, shouting, "You know very well that's not what this is about, Junkyu, stop it!"

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Bathroom

Junghwan dropped down beside the toilet bowl after vomiting for several minutes. He felt dirty and tired but, above all, vulnerable.

The bathroom window was open, and it was cold.

Shivering, Junghwan stood up to cool his face at the tap. Leaning on the edge of the tap, he looked at himself in the mirror. Droplets of water were falling down his face. His pupils were dilated, probably because he'd taken something he shouldn't have.