Crush

Aftertalk

I'm still thinking about that kiss. It just won't go out of my head. I keep picturing us in that dressing room. Leah's lips on mine, my hands at her cheeks and her beautiful blue eyes looking into mine. This kiss was perfect. The timing was perfect. She took all my fears away with this kiss. We didn't talk about it tho. We didn't speak about it the evening after it happened. We also didn't share a bed in the night. I don't know. I was able to sleep on my own. Probably because I was still wonderstruck from the kiss.

The next morning I get up and get ready before going downstairs to have breakfast. We don't have training so I don't need to hurry up. Leah is already there and is sitting at the table while eating.

"Morning." I say at her.

"Morning." She looks up at me. She doesn't smile. Why isn't she smiling? Normally she always smiles at me in the morning and I love that. I need her smile. I just shake it off and get my food. I make myself a coffee and sit at the table with Leah. Neither of us says a word. This is somehow weird. I look up at her shortly but she isn't looking at me. I look down again and continue to eat. I don't know what to say.

"So we won't talk about it?" Leah speaks up after a while of silence.

"About what?" I look up and this time my eyes meet hers.

"About us kissing in the dressing room." She says. I get a smile on my face as she says that.

"What should we talk about?"

"What are we doing now? Are we just pretending that it didn't happen? And what about that shower thing yesterday morning?" Leah asks. I instantly feel my cheeks blushing.

"Well, there was some kind of sexual tension between us for a while." I mumble.

"Is it just sexual for you?"

"I don't know what it is. Is it for you?" I get so insecure. I didn't think we would have this conversation.

"No. I like you, Rosalie. I really like you. I don't mean just as a friend. I like you more than that. This kiss and the things it made me feel just confirmed that for me." She says. So she is in love with me? Katie was right. Shit. What should I do now?

"I just have feelings that I never had before. I don't know what they are. I like being around you and you make me feel good. My body just feels drawn to you." I say. Leah looks at me and lets out a sigh.

"Did you enjoy the kiss?"

"Yes. I enjoyed every second of it. I never had a kiss that felt like this. I didn't even know a kiss could feel like this. I can't stop thinking about it, about you." I say quietly. I never talked about my feelings like this.

"Okay, listen I know this is hard for you and something new. I don't want to overwhelm you or anything. I will give you time to figure this out. I just want you to know that I'm here. I'm here for you. My heart beats for you. Just tell me how you want to do this and if you want to do this." She says so calm. I love this calm way of being about her. She always brings me down with that.

"Wait, what about that girl you had your eyes on?" I remember what she told me when we had camp. I don't want her to run off to someone else if I don't hurry up.

"That's you, you dummy. I was talking about you. I had my eyes on you." She says with a smile.

"Oh." Now it makes sense. So she already said that she wanted to give me time.

"So you think I'm worth waiting for?" I ask. That is what she said.

"Yes." She nods.

"I just need time to figure out my feelings but I don't want to be alone for that. I want to figure them out with you."