(Discontinued) scarian oneshots

A return (A/N)

TW: SH mention(s).

Hello, everyone. Austin here, or Twein which ever you remember me as. I want to speak up about where I have been and why I was gone for so long.

My break was only supposed to be until December 27th, 2022. But the universe had other plans as I have suffered the worst year of my life being 2023 so far, it lacked me motivation to even post on here. I was sick (a lot), I lost a "friend" (who I will not be naming), I feel into a state of mind where I thought I deserved nothing in life, and so much more.

I don't wanna go into detail, but I will say that I am trying to heal. I have decided to make a new account on Wattpad as a fresh start and as a way to forget about a certain someone, but even then, I still got harassed by one of their friends and called some untrue things. Although, I have since blocked the person. Honestly, during my planned break I had two au books planned and release date. But things got a bit messy.

I discovered a new fandom which I really like and a ship I like, I wrote fics on them. But didn't share them with people, only one person knew at the time. Anyways, aside from that. I was dealing with something serious before and even during my break which was self harm, I won't go into detail. But it got to the point where it affected me online. 

I still am moving accounts, I will link my new account at the end of this too. But for now, I will talk about things.

One reason why I started my break was because school was starting, it was my first time doing online and I was 14. I still am doing online and I hope to be more productive with things, I also tried posting on Ao3 for a bit. But only managed to post 3-4 things, but I do plan on posting on ao3 again. Although, I'd like to keep it private from certain people. 

I did have a plan to return onto Wattpad, but it didn't work out due to me forgetting and getting busy. I was also experiencing sickness near the 22nd to the end of each month last year around June which made it hard to write and made me live in fear, I hate when it comes to things inside your body (irl, graphic games, & movies mainly). 

And despite my lack motivation to write which still sucks even now, I still try. I have gotten better and I do take some criticism, but not much as I get insecure with my writing. I want to be able to write more and develop my way of writing rather than waste away in my bed resenting everything I have done with my life.

I wish I had an excuse of "forgot", or something. But I don't and this is what it is, I would like to go more into depth on why. But I do not wish to be harassed again. I would love for those who have been patient with me and waited for my return to keep being supportive and those who have just found out I existed cause, man! Wattpad was busy with my fic while I was gone, weren't they? Over 40k reads on a silly little thing to express my hyperfixation, I know who would be impressed.. Myself! 2 years ago which I kinda miss being like that. I wrote badly, but I was having fun and it didn't ever become a chore as I was actually happy for once over writing. The whole reason I became a writer was because people said I wrote good; they encouraged me to become one and I believed them. But now I feel as I can't do a single thing without the slightest embarrassment, I can't write without either deleting it or leaving it to rot in Reedsy for months..

But who cares now? No one! Anyways, I am healing and getting better from everything that has happened recently what started being a good year went downhill. But hey! It's getting better, so I'm sure it'll be okay. 

Uhm.. that's it, that's really all. That's my excuse I guess, I mean.. I write on computer now! Isn't that neat, yeah? Woo!! Anyways, here's my new account  

Oh, isn't that a lovely name! So beautiful, I know. Thank you, you're so kind. :3

Also, I will respond to comments on that account as I will be logging out of this account until I am comfortable to be on it or something.. Idk.. The stories I have posted on this account will remain up, feel free to read them. But I will attempt rewriting them on my new account! Everything will be.. probably different.. Uhh, byebye!!